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  • DistroMan 20:00 on January 28, 2012 Permalink | Log in to leave a Comment
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    Psalm 85: Religion. The daftest form of gambling known to man. 

    Psalms Part 85 of 150

    For the Chief Musician. A Psalm by the sons of Korah.

    1 Yahweh, you have been favorable to your land.

    You have restored the fortunes of Jacob.

    Proof or it didn’t happen.

    2 You have forgiven the iniquity of your people.

    You have covered all their sin.

    Proof please.

    Selah.

    3 You have taken away all your wrath.

    You have turned from the fierceness of your anger.

    Waffle without proof is just waffle.

    4 Turn us, God of our salvation,

    and cause your indignation toward us to cease.

    How do you know he is indignant toward you?

    5 Will you be angry with us forever?

    Will you draw out your anger to all generations?

    If you go by the bible, then yes, he just might.

    6 Won’t you revive us again,

    that your people may rejoice in you?

    I wouldn’t.  I’d make you work hard and achieve things for yourself.

    7 Show us your loving kindness, Yahweh.

    Grant us your salvation.

    Still after something for nothing.

    8 I will hear what God, Yahweh, will speak,

    for he will speak peace to his people, his saints;

    but let them not turn again to folly.

    Hearing voices again huh?

    9 Surely his salvation is near those who fear him,

    that glory may dwell in our land.

    I’m still to figure out the real need for fearing him.

    10 Mercy and truth meet together.

    Righteousness and peace have kissed each other.

    But mercy and righteousness have naught to do with fear.

    11 Truth springs out of the earth.

    Righteousness has looked down from heaven.

    And you have your head up your arse.  It’s all that shit in your head that is stopping you from figuring out how moronic you sound.

    12 Yes, Yahweh will give that which is good.

    Our land will yield its increase.

    Is an increase in yield worth the lives that were lost for you to acquire the land?  Where was mercy then?  Where was the love; the kindness; the caring for your fellow man?

    13 Righteousness goes before him,

    And prepares the way for his steps.

    The only thing that went before you was an army that killed everyone in it’s path.

    << Psalm 84      Index      Psalm 86 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on January 27, 2012 Permalink | Log in to leave a Comment
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    Psalm 84: The Bible. Metaphor or Urban Legend? 

    Psalms Part 84 of 150

    For the Chief Musician. On an instrument of Gath. A Psalm by the sons of Korah.

    1 How lovely are your dwellings,

    So if someone has a lovely looking house it makes them good?

    Yahweh of Armies!

    That isn’t exactly high praise.

    2 My soul longs, and even faints for the courts of Yahweh.

    My heart and my flesh cry out for the living God.

    Drama Queen much?

    3 Yes, the sparrow has found a home,

    and the swallow a nest for herself, where she may have her young,

    near your altars, Yahweh of Armies, my King, and my God.

    I don’t know if I’d want to bring my kids up around this kind of army.  They kill kids.

    4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house.

    They are always praising you.

    I think the phrase you’re looking for is ‘sucking up’.

    Selah.

    5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you;

    who have set their hearts on a pilgrimage.

    How does that make anyone blessed?  These arbitrary statements made as if that makes them fact really annoy me.

    6 Passing through the valley of Weeping, they make it a place of springs.

    Yes, the autumn rain covers it with blessings.

    Rain? Rain is blessings?  More stupid statements.

    7 They go from strength to strength.

    Everyone of them appears before God in Zion.

    Prove it.

    8 Yahweh, God of Armies, hear my prayer.

    Listen, God of Jacob.

    I’d ask you to prove God has ears to hear with, but you haven’t even proven God exists yet.

    Selah.

    9 Behold, God our shield,

    look at the face of your anointed.

    With what? His mythical eyes?

    10 For a day in your courts is better than a thousand.

    I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God,

    than to dwell in the tents of wickedness.

    Calling them wicked doesn’t make them so.  This is just more of you putting down those who don’t agree with your dogma.  This crap still happens today much to my annoyance.

    11 For Yahweh God is a sun and a shield.

    Yahweh will give grace and glory.

    Explain.  What is grace and how is it given?  Same with glory.

    He withholds no good thing from those who walk blamelessly.

    Go back and read this idiot book and you’ll find he does do that quite often.

    12 Yahweh of Armies,

    blessed is the man who trusts in you.

    Locked up in a padded room might safer.

    << Psalm 83      Index      Psalm 85 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on January 26, 2012 Permalink | Log in to leave a Comment
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    Psalm 83: God can’t be all powerful if he failed to pick a winning team with these guys. 

    Psalms Part 83 of 150

    A song. A Psalm by Asaph.

    1 God, don’t keep silent.

    Don’t keep silent,

    and don’t be still, God.

    He’s the boss and you tell him what to do?

    2 For, behold, your enemies are stirred up.

    Those who hate you have lifted up their heads.

    The statement that they hate God most probably isn’t true.  It’s the same these days when the religious keep rabbiting on about atheists hating Gawd.  We don’t and can’t hate something that we don’t believe exists.  It’s about time you guys showed some kind of intelligence and got that simple fact into your heads.

    3 They conspire with cunning against your people.

    They plot against your cherished ones.

    As you guys did when you attacked them.  Fairness can be a real bitch sometimes, can’t it!!!

    4 “Come,” they say, “let’s destroy them as a nation,

    that the name of Israel may be remembered no more.”

    Considering how many nations Israel destroyed on their way, what do you expect?

    5 For they have conspired together with one mind.

    They form an alliance against you.

    That would be good thinking when they have you around.

    6 The tents of Edom and the Ishmaelites;

    Moab, and the Hagrites;

    7 Gebal, Ammon, and Amalek;

    Philistia with the inhabitants of Tyre;

    8 Assyria also is joined with them.

    They have helped the children of Lot.

    Selah.

    Yay them!!!

    9 Do to them as you did to Midian,

    as to Sisera, as to Jabin, at the river Kishon;

    10 who perished at Endor,

    who became as dung for the earth.

    See!!  You guys did that crap to those, so don’t go expecting this lot to sit still and let you do it to them as well.

    11 Make their nobles like Oreb and Zeeb;

    yes, all their princes like Zebah and Zalmunna;

    12 who said, “Let us take possession of God’s pasture lands.”

    They aren’t God’s pasture lands.  They belonged to somebody else till you guys came along, murdered the owners and stole the land.

    13 My God, make them like tumbleweed;

    like chaff before the wind.

    It would have been simpler and caused lot less loss of life if he had have just killed you guys off in the beginning. Everyone else could have lived a lot safer lives without you storming across the land laying waste to anything that moved.

    14 As the fire that burns the forest,

    as the flame that sets the mountains on fire,

    15 so pursue them with your tempest,

    and terrify them with your storm.

    16 Fill their faces with confusion,

    that they may seek your name, Yahweh.

    17 Let them be disappointed and dismayed forever.

    Yes, let them be confounded and perish;

    18 that they may know that you alone, whose name is Yahweh,

    are the Most High over all the earth.

    That is quite a freaking stupid thing to say.  You want them to perish, but to know God did it to them?  They can’t know it if it hasn’t happened, and by the time it has happened, they would be dead.  No wonder people look on the religious as a bunch of halfwits.  Take a little time to think about what you are saying before opening your mouths. It would help a lot.

    << Psalm 82      Index      Psalm 84 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on January 25, 2012 Permalink | Log in to leave a Comment
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    Psalm 82: Drop God, forget wars, stay home, work hard and prosper. 

    Psalms Part 82 of 150

    A Psalm by Asaph.

    1 God presides in the great assembly.

    He judges among the gods.

    Again the admission there is more than one god.

    2 “How long will you judge unjustly,

    and show partiality to the wicked?”

    Selah.

    He’s not.  That’s just you being pissed off that those you don’t like are doing better than you.  Get over it and work harder.

    3 “Defend the weak, the poor, and the fatherless.

    Maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed.

    This is probably what the so called ‘wicked’ are already doing and why they are doing better.  They aren’t wasting their time praying to non existent morons.

    4 Rescue the weak and needy.

    Deliver them out of the hand of the wicked.”

    Maybe they wouldn’t be weak and needy if they stayed home and looked after themselves instead going out fighting wars and wasting everything.

    5 They don’t know, neither do they understand.

    They walk back and forth in darkness.

    All the foundations of the earth are shaken.

    And yet they are doing better than you.

    6 I said, “You are gods,

    all of you are sons of the Most High.

    7 Nevertheless you shall die like men,

    and fall like one of the rulers.”

    8 Arise, God, judge the earth,

    for you inherit all of the nations.

    You lot didn’t even know about the rest of the earth, so how can he inherit ‘all of the nations’?

    << Psalm 81      Index      Psalm 83 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on January 25, 2012 Permalink | Log in to leave a Comment
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    Distro’s Bible Commentary: An Index 

    Warning: The Bible is a work of fiction and should not be taken literally. It contains verses descriptive or advocating suicide, incest, bestiality, sadomasochism, sexual activity in a violet manner, murder, morbid violence, use of drugs or alcohol, homosexuality, voyeurism, revenge, animal cruelty, undermining of authority figures, lawlessness and human rights violations and atrocities.

    Exposure to contents for extended periods of time or during formative years in children may cause delusions, hallucinations, decreased cognitive and objective reasoning abilities, and, in extreme cases, pathological disorders, hatred, bigotry and violence including but not limited to fanaticism, murder and genocide.

    Genesis – Exodus – Leviticus – Numbers – Deuteronomy – Joshua – Judges – Ruth – 1-Samuel – 2 Samuel – 1 Kings – 2 Kings – 1 Chronicles – 2 Chronicles – Ezra – Nehemiah – Esther – Job – Psalms – Proverbs – Ecclesiastes – Song of Solomon – Isaiah – Jeremiah – Lamentations – Ezekiel – Daniel – Hosea – Joel – Amos – Obadiah – Jonah – Micah – Nahum – Habakkuk – Zephaniah – Haggai – Zechariah – Malachi – Matthew – Mark – Luke – John – Acts – Romans – 1 Corinthians – 2 Corinthians – Galatians – Ephesians – Philippians – Colossians – 1 Thessalonians – 2 Thessalonians – 1 Timothy – 2 Timothy – Titus – Philemon – Hebrews – James – 1 Peter – 2 Peter – 1 John – 2 John – 3 John – Jude – Revelation

    Genesis

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20

    21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – 32 – 33 – 34 – 35 – 36 – 37 – 38 – 39 – 40

    41 – 42 – 43 – 44 – 45 – 46 – 47 – 48 – 49 – 50 – My thoughts on Genesis

    Exodus

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – 32 – 33 – 34 – 35 – 36 – 37 – 38 – 39 – 40 – My thoughts on Exodus

    Leviticus

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – My thoughts on Leviticus

    Numbers

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – 32 – 33 – 34 – 35 – 36 – My thoughts on Numbers

    Deuteronomy

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – 32 – 33 – 34 – My thoughts on Deuteronomy

    Joshua

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – My thoughts on Joshua

    Judges

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – My thoughts on Judges

    Ruth

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – My thoughts on Ruth

    1-Samuel

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – My thoughts on 1-Samuel

    2-Samuel

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – My thoughts on 2-Samuel

    1-Kings

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – My thoughts on 1-Kings

    2-Kings

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – My thoughts on 2-Kings

    1-Chronicles

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – My thoughts on 1-Chronicles

    2-Chronicles

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – 32 – 33 – 34 – 35 – 36 – My thoughts on 2-Chronicles

    Ezra

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – My thoughts on Ezra

    Nehemiah

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – My thoughts on Nehemiah

    Esther

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – My thoughts on Esther

    Job

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – 32 – 33 – 34 – 35 – 36 – 37 – 38 – 39 – 40 – 41 – 42 – My thoughts on Job

    Psalms

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – 32 – 33 – 34 – 35 – 36 – 37 – 38 – 39 – 40 – 41 – 42 – 43 – 44 – 45 – 46 – 47 – 48 – 49 – 50 – 51 – 52 – 53 – 54 – 55 – 56 – 57 – 58 – 59 – 60 – 61 – 62 – 63 – 64 – 65 – 66 – 67 – 68 – 69 – 70 – 71 – 72 – 73 – 74 – 75 – 76 – 77 – 78 – 79 – 80 – 81 – 82 – 83 – 84 – 85

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on January 24, 2012 Permalink | Log in to leave a Comment
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    Psalm 81: If God is a magician, does he have a pretty assistant named Sharon? 

    Psalms Part 81 of 150

    For the Chief Musician. On an instrument of Gath. By Asaph.

    1 Sing aloud to God, our strength!

    Make a joyful shout to the God of Jacob!

    We’ll get the bit that your god isn’t real, so can’t be shouted at, sung to and most definitely isn’t your strength out of the way right now so we can move on to doing what I really like, which is bagging him out for being a murderous, genocidal, baby torturer.

    2 Raise a song, and bring here the tambourine,

    the pleasant lyre with the harp.

    Yeah, you’d sing to a god that could do those things.  You’d praise him as if doing those things were moral.  How could you?

    3 Blow the trumpet at the New Moon,

    at the full moon, on our feast day.

    Nothing wrong with that.  It’s festive.

    4 For it is a statute for Israel,

    an ordinance of the God of Jacob.

    No, it’s a moronic law made up by some priest to get you guys to do what they want.  A little bit of music to keep you happy.

    5 He appointed it in Joseph for a testimony,

    when he went out over the land of Egypt,

    I heard a language that I didn’t know.

    Mr Airy Fairy is supposed to be omnipresent, which in case you didn’t know, means he is everywhere at all times.  If we take that as being true, then he didn’t ‘go out over the land of Egypt’.  If we take the ‘go out over the land of Egypt’ as being true, then he isn’t omnipresent and isn’t a god.

    6 “I removed his shoulder from the burden.

    His hands were freed from the basket.

    7 You called in trouble, and I delivered you.

    I answered you in the secret place of thunder.

    I tested you at the waters of Meribah.”

    Here’s another one. If he’s a god, then he knows all and wouldn’t need to test anyone. As he admits he is testing you, then he isn’t all-knowing.

    Selah.

    8 “Hear, my people, and I will testify to you,

    Israel, if you would listen to me!

    9 There shall be no strange god in you,

    Well, that’s screwed for a start.  They don’t come much stranger than Yahweh.

    neither shall you worship any foreign god.

    Bummer, I’ve always had a hankering for Ra.  :)

    10 I am Yahweh, your God,

    who brought you up out of the land of Egypt.

    Open your mouth wide, and I will fill it.

    That sounds too much like today’s priests for my liking.  No wonder they seem to think what they do is acceptable.

    11 But my people didn’t listen to my voice.

    Israel desired none of me.

    12 So I let them go after the stubbornness of their hearts,

    that they might walk in their own counsels.

    It is more than likely that they would have had a better chance if you had have stayed out of their lives in the first place instead of sending them to war over and over.

    13 Oh that my people would listen to me,

    that Israel would walk in my ways!

    They keep trying and it still isn’t doing them any good.

    14 I would soon subdue their enemies,

    and turn my hand against their adversaries.

    God is supposed to have made all of us, so why is everyone other than Israel so expendable?

    15 The haters of Yahweh would cringe before him,

    and their punishment would last forever.

    People who don’t follow him or don’t even know about him have, on the whole, no different lives than those that do.  In some cases, even better lives.  Moral ones at that before you start on that track.

    16 But he would have also fed them with the finest of the wheat.

    I will satisfy you with honey out of the rock.”

    Honey out of rock?  Oh My Dog!!!  He’s pulling his magic wand out again.   :)

    << Psalm 80      Index      Psalm 82 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on January 23, 2012 Permalink | Log in to leave a Comment
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    Psalm 80: If he’d help those who ‘use’ him, he isn’t much of a god. 

    Psalms Part 80 of 150

    For the Chief Musician. To the tune of “The Lilies of the Covenant.” A Psalm by Asaph.

    1 Hear us, Shepherd of Israel,

    you who lead Joseph like a flock,

    you who sit above the cherubim, shine out.

    2 Before Ephraim and Benjamin and Manasseh, stir up your might!

    Come to save us!

    Why?

    3 Turn us again, God.

    Cause your face to shine,

    and we will be saved.

    Still, why?

    4 Yahweh God of Armies,

    How long will you be angry against the prayer of your people?

    What makes you think he’s angry with you?

    5 You have fed them with the bread of tears,

    and given them tears to drink in large measure.

    Explain.

    6 You make us a source of contention to our neighbors.

    Our enemies laugh among themselves.

    Probably because you mistreated them and now they have a chance to wreak vengeance up on you.

    7 Turn us again, God of Armies.

    Well, there’s a line that says a lot.

    Cause your face to shine,

    and we will be saved.

    8 You brought a vine out of Egypt.

    You drove out the nations, and planted it.

    It seems to have been a wrong move.

    9 You cleared the ground for it.

    It took deep root, and filled the land.

    It festered and became rotten at the roots.

    10 The mountains were covered with its shadow.

    Its boughs were like God’s cedars.

    11 It sent out its branches to the sea,

    Its shoots to the River.

    Taking over everyone else’s land by murder, rape and pillage.

    12 Why have you broken down its walls,

    so that all those who pass by the way pluck it?

    It is you who have become weak.

    13 The boar out of the wood ravages it.

    The wild animals of the field feed on it.

    After all the animal lives lost at your hand, it is probably time you gave a little back.

    14 Turn again, we beg you, God of Armies.

    Look down from heaven, and see, and visit this vine,

    15 the stock which your right hand planted,

    the branch that you made strong for yourself.

    16 It’s burned with fire.

    It’s cut down.

    They perish at your rebuke.

    17 Let your hand be on the man of your right hand,

    on the son of man whom you made strong for yourself.

    18 So we will not turn away from you.

    Revive us, and we will call on your name.

    So you will only turn back to Gawd if he does things you ask for?  If he really is a god, do you think he’d like the way you’re trying to use him?

    19 Turn us again, Yahweh God of Armies.

    Cause your face to shine, and we will be saved.

    Save yourself.  Work hard, look after others, be nice.  Make friends with your neighbors and enemies.  You’d be amazed how much that might help.  It would certainly be quicker than waiting on your imaginary friend to get on with things.

    << Psalm 79      Index      Psalm 81 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on January 22, 2012 Permalink | Log in to leave a Comment
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    Psalm 79: Oh poor us! Whinge. Whine. Moan and groan. 

    Psalms Part 79 of 150

    A Psalm by Asaph.

    1 God, the nations have come into your inheritance.

    They have defiled your holy temple.

    They have laid Jerusalem in heaps.

    While your non-existent imaginary friend did nothing.  Put that on his resumé.

    2 They have given the dead bodies of your servants to be food for the birds of the sky,

    the flesh of your saints to the animals of the earth.

    It’s called recycling.  I have no problem with that.

    3 Their blood they have shed like water around Jerusalem.

    There was no one to bury them.

    Loss of life is never good, but how many lives had they taken themselves before this?

    4 We have become a reproach to our neighbors,

    a scoffing and derision to those who are around us.

    You’ve been that way a long time.

    5 How long, Yahweh?

    Will you be angry forever?

    Will your jealousy burn like fire?

    I think we already have anger and jealousy on the list.

    6 Pour out your wrath on the nations that don’t know you;

    Wrathful sounds nice.  We can add that.

    on the kingdoms that don’t call on your name;

    7 For they have devoured Jacob,

    and destroyed his homeland.

    Who allowed it to happen?  The buck has to stop with those that have the power to have changed things.

    8 Don’t hold the iniquities of our forefathers against us.

    Ah, but that is one of his rules.

    Let your tender mercies speedily meet us,

    We can’t be talking about the same gawd!

    for we are in desperate need.

    Change your ways.  Meet with the enemy and work things out.  Not that you’ve given them any reason to trust you.

    9 Help us, God of our salvation, for the glory of your name.

    Deliver us, and forgive our sins, for your name’s sake.

    That is more likely to work if he was real.  He doesn’t seem to want to ever do things because you want or need it, but just because it glorifies his name.  His ego is what it’s all about.

    10 Why should the nations say, “Where is their God?”

    Let it be known among the nations, before our eyes,

    that vengeance for your servants’ blood is being poured out.

    More war!  More war!  Yeah, that seems to be the only thing you guys care about.  Have you never heard of diplomacy?

    11 Let the sighing of the prisoner come before you.

    According to the greatness of your power, preserve those who are sentenced to death.

    Even if they are your enemy?

    12 Pay back to our neighbors seven times into their bosom

    their reproach with which they have reproached you, Lord.

    Ah, as I thought.  How neighborly of you.

    13 So we, your people and sheep of your pasture,

    will give you thanks forever.

    We will praise you forever, to all generations.

    You love him so much because he helps you kill your enemies?

    The big problem here is that when there is credit due, you give it to your god, but when responsibility has to be taken for something going wrong it’s always humanity that has to pay the price.

    << Psalm 78      Index      Psalm 80 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on January 21, 2012 Permalink | Log in to leave a Comment
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    Psalm 78: Hope springs eternal, only to be shat upon by Gawd. 

    Psalms Part 78 of 150

    A contemplation by Asaph.

    1 Hear my teaching, my people.

    Turn your ears to the words of my mouth.

    I await your words with great anticipation in the hope they will inspire.

    2 I will open my mouth in a parable.

    I will utter dark sayings of old,

    Already I begin to feel let down.  Uttering more positive words would be good.  Why do we have to have dark sayings?

    3 Which we have heard and known,

    and our fathers have told us.

    4 We will not hide them from their children,

    telling to the generation to come the praises of Yahweh,

    his strength, and his wondrous works that he has done.

    Then you are only repeating lies that have been told before.  You have no justification for this at all.

    5 For he established a testimony in Jacob,

    and appointed a teaching in Israel,

    which he commanded our fathers,

    that they should make them known to their children;

    No.  These stories were made up and eventually written down, only to be used to control and bleed the population.

    6 that the generation to come might know, even the children who should be born;

    who should arise and tell their children,

    7 that they might set their hope in God,

    and not forget the works of God,

    but keep his commandments,

    All of which are not good commandments or are stolen from other traditions.

    8 and might not be as their fathers,

    a stubborn and rebellious generation,

    a generation that didn’t make their hearts loyal,

    whose spirit was not steadfast with God.

    Maybe they just wanted to be able to lead their lives in a fashion of their own choosing without the immoral and ridiculous constraints imposed upon them by the priesthood.

    9 The children of Ephraim, being armed and carrying bows,

    turned back in the day of battle.

    10 They didn’t keep God’s covenant,

    and refused to walk in his law.

    Maybe they had woken up to the inherent problems of following a non existent god that was being used to make them commit immoral and inhumane acts?  Maybe.

    11 They forgot his doings,

    his wondrous works that he had shown them.

    They had not been shown anything.  They had only been ‘told’ these things had happened.  They were conned.

    12 He did marvelous things in the sight of their fathers,

    in the land of Egypt, in the field of Zoan.

    Wrong.

    13 He split the sea, and caused them to pass through.

    He made the waters stand as a heap.

    Wrong.

    14 In the daytime he also led them with a cloud,

    and all night with a light of fire.

    They would have followed anything the priests told them to as long as the cloud was headed in the direction the priests wanted to go.

    15 He split rocks in the wilderness,

    and gave them drink abundantly as out of the depths.

    Wrong.

    16 He brought streams also out of the rock,

    and caused waters to run down like rivers.

    Wrong.

    17 Yet they still went on to sin against him,

    to rebel against the Most High in the desert.

    Maybe they were getting sick of starving and wandering about all their lives with no end is sight?

    18 They tempted God in their heart

    by asking food according to their desire.

    That has to be better than starving to death because you’re afraid to speak up.

    19 Yes, they spoke against God.

    They said, “Can God prepare a table in the wilderness?

    No he can’t.

    20 Behold, he struck the rock, so that waters gushed out,

    and streams overflowed.

    Wrong.

    Can he give bread also?

    Will he provide flesh for his people?”

    No he can’t.

    21 Therefore Yahweh heard, and was angry.

    A fire was kindled against Jacob,

    anger also went up against Israel,

    Wrong

    22 because they didn’t believe in God,

    and didn’t trust in his salvation.

    I don’t blame them.  It’s a ridiculous proposition.

    23 Yet he commanded the skies above,

    and opened the doors of heaven.

    24 He rained down manna on them to eat,

    and gave them food from the sky.

    Wrong.

    25 Man ate the bread of angels.

    He sent them food to the full.

    26 He caused the east wind to blow in the sky.

    By his power he guided the south wind.

    27 He rained also flesh on them as the dust;

    winged birds as the sand of the seas.

    Wrong.

    28 He let them fall in the midst of their camp,

    around their habitations.

    29 So they ate, and were well filled.

    He gave them their own desire.

    All lies.

    30 They didn’t turn from their cravings.

    Their food was yet in their mouths,

    31 when the anger of God went up against them,

    killed some of their fattest,

    and struck down the young men of Israel.

    Why would or should anyone want to follow a god that mistreated them in this manner?

    32 For all this they still sinned,

    and didn’t believe in his wondrous works.

    Smarter than I gave them credit for then.

    33 Therefore he consumed their days in vanity,

    and their years in terror.

    More harsh treatment.

    34 When he killed them, then they inquired after him.

    They returned and sought God earnestly.

    More likely they gave in because the priests were convincing them that the naturally occurring deaths were the work of God.  This is typical of religion.  It scares people into submission.

    35 They remembered that God was their rock,

    A rock that would bash their heads in if they didn’t behave.

    the Most High God, their redeemer.

    36 But they flattered him with their mouth,

    and lied to him with their tongue.

    If it keeps the morons of their backs, it’s a good thing.  Having a defensive strategy when being attacked is a smart move.

    37 For their heart was not right with him,

    neither were they faithful in his covenant.

    38 But he, being merciful, forgave iniquity, and didn’t destroy them.

    Yes, many times he turned his anger away,

    and didn’t stir up all his wrath.

    ‘All’ his wrath.  So some of it was.  That isn’t quite being merciful then, is it?

    39 He remembered that they were but flesh,

    a wind that passes away, and doesn’t come again.

    That’s interesting.  It seems to belie their claim to a hereafter.

    40 How often they rebelled against him in the wilderness,

    and grieved him in the desert!

    41 They turned again and tempted God,

    and provoked the Holy One of Israel.

    How is he merciful and full of loving-kindness if he can be provoked?  This says he is NOT perfect.  Not a god.

    42 They didn’t remember his hand,

    nor the day when he redeemed them from the adversary;

    43 how he set his signs in Egypt,

    his wonders in the field of Zoan,

    44 he turned their rivers into blood,

    and their streams, so that they could not drink.

    All lies.

    45 He sent among them swarms of flies, which devoured them;

    and frogs, which destroyed them.

    Here comes the mercy he is so famous for…  :)

    46 He gave also their increase to the caterpillar,

    and their labor to the locust.

    47 He destroyed their vines with hail,

    their sycamore fig trees with frost.

    48 He gave over their livestock also to the hail,

    and their flocks to hot thunderbolts.

    49 He threw on them the fierceness of his anger,

    wrath, indignation, and trouble,

    and a band of angels of evil.

    50 He made a path for his anger.

    He didn’t spare their soul from death,

    but gave their life over to the pestilence,

    51 and struck all the firstborn in Egypt,

    How can any being, whether they be human or supposed deity think that attacking innocent children is a righteous act?

    the chief of their strength in the tents of Ham.

    52 But he led out his own people like sheep,

    and guided them in the wilderness like a flock.

    53 He led them safely, so that they weren’t afraid,

    How could you not be afraid after what he was supposed to have just done?

    but the sea overwhelmed their enemies.

    54 He brought them to the border of his sanctuary,

    to this mountain, which his right hand had taken.

    55 He also drove out the nations before them,

    Drove out?  Read that part of the bible again.  They weren’t just driven out.  They were murdered en mass.

    allotted them for an inheritance by line,

    and made the tribes of Israel to dwell in their tents.

    56 Yet they tempted and rebelled against the Most High God,

    and didn’t keep his testimonies;

    57 but turned back, and dealt treacherously like their fathers.

    They were turned aside like a deceitful bow.

    58 For they provoked him to anger with their high places,

    and moved him to jealousy with their engraved images.

    Jealousy?  A god with jealousy?  That is no god.

    59 When God heard this, he was angry,

    and greatly abhorred Israel;

    A god with jealousy and hatred.

    60 So that he abandoned the tent of Shiloh,

    the tent which he placed among men;

    61 and delivered his strength into captivity,

    his glory into the adversary’s hand.

    A god with jealousy, hatred and vengeance.

    62 He also gave his people over to the sword,

    and was angry with his inheritance.

    A god with jealousy, hatred, vengeance and murder in what may be his heart.  If he has one.  It seems not.

    63 Fire devoured their young men.

    Their virgins had no wedding song.

    64 Their priests fell by the sword,

    and their widows couldn’t weep.

    Not one bit of this has anything to do with a god.  There are no such things as gods outside of the imaginings of morons.

    65 Then the Lord awakened as one out of sleep,

    like a mighty man who shouts by reason of wine.

    He needs sleep?  Just one more failing to add to an ever growing list.

    66 He struck his adversaries backward.

    He put them to a perpetual reproach.

    How can an all powerful god have adversaries?  Why would he need them?

    67 Moreover he rejected the tent of Joseph,

    and didn’t choose the tribe of Ephraim,

    68 But chose the tribe of Judah,

    Mount Zion which he loved.

    Which would only be favouritism.  Not a very godly attribute.

    69 He built his sanctuary like the heights,

    like the earth which he has established forever.

    70 He also chose David his servant,

    and took him from the sheepfolds;

    71 from following the ewes that have their young,

    he brought him to be the shepherd of Jacob, his people,

    and Israel, his inheritance.

    He didn’t choose very well then.  Another failing.

    72 So he was their shepherd according to the integrity of his heart,

    and guided them by the skillfulness of his hands.

    That would be a worry after everything else he has done wrong.

    << Psalm 77      Index      Psalm 79 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on January 20, 2012 Permalink | Log in to leave a Comment
    Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,   

    Psalm 77: Is your front door reporting your every move? Is your navel lint keeping an eye on you? 

    Psalms Part 77 of 150

    For the Chief Musician. To Jeduthun. A Psalm by Asaph.

    1 My cry goes to God!

    Indeed, I cry to God for help,

    and for him to listen to me.

    Why not help yourself and accept what can’t be changed.  Then get on with your life.  It’s worked for billions of others.

    2 In the day of my trouble I sought the Lord.

    My hand was stretched out in the night, and didn’t get tired.

    My soul refused to be comforted.

    Well there you go.  If you refuse to get over it and get on with life you have nobody else to blame.

    3 I remember God, and I groan.

    I complain, and my spirit is overwhelmed.

    Selah.

    I’d ignore you then.

    4 You hold my eyelids open.

    I am so troubled that I can’t speak.

    Lies.  You won’t shutup.

    5 I have considered the days of old,

    the years of ancient times.

    6 I remember my song in the night.

    I consider in my own heart;

    my spirit diligently inquires:

    7 “Will the Lord reject us forever?

    Will he be favorable no more?

    Why would you rely on a god in the first place?  If you work hard and look after yourself, then at least you succeed even if he does ignore you, but to fail completely because you relied on him totally, is incomprehensibly stupid to say the least.

    8 Has his loving kindness vanished forever?

    It never existed.

    Does his promise fail for generations?

    IT NEVER EXISTED!!!

    9 Has God forgotten to be gracious?

    All wise, all knowing, all powerful, and yet you ask if he has forgotten? <facepalm.

    Has he, in anger, withheld his compassion?”

    If he did, then it’s a good bet it was because of your stupidity.

    Selah.

    10 Then I thought, “I will appeal to this:

    the years of the right hand of the Most High.”

    11 I will remember Yah’s deeds;

    for I will remember your wonders of old.

    What wonders?  Aren’t you only talking about stories you were told?  Hearsay?  They mean nothing.

    12 I will also meditate on all your work,

    and consider your doings.

    13 Your way, God, is in the sanctuary.

    Isn’t it supposed to be everywhere?  Not just in one place?

    What god is great like God?

    Admitting there is more than one god?  Blasphemy I say!!!  :)

    14 You are the God who does wonders.

    You have made your strength known among the peoples.

    Through myth and fables.

    15 You have redeemed your people with your arm,

    the sons of Jacob and Joseph.

    Selah.

    16 The waters saw you, God.

    The waters saw you, and they writhed.

    Water doesn’t have eyes.  Why all the anthropomorphism of inanimate objects?  Are you scared your navel lint might be watching you too?

    The depths also convulsed.

    17 The clouds poured out water.

    The skies resounded with thunder.

    Your arrows also flashed around.

    Thunderstorms.  Get over it.

    18 The voice of your thunder was in the whirlwind.

    The lightnings lit up the world.

    The earth trembled and shook.

    So?  Did you crap yourself everytime you had a thunderstorm?  That’s pathetic.

    19 Your way was through the sea;

    your paths through the great waters.

    Your footsteps were not known.

    Nothing was known, just believed.  Sheep!

    20 You led your people like a flock,

    by the hand of Moses and Aaron.

    Like credulous little children.  Will these people ever grow up and start behaving like modern man should?  Not anytime soon it seems.

    << Psalm 76      Index      Psalm 78 >>

     

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