Joshua 23: You are past your ‘use by date’ dude.
Joshua: Part 23 of 24
Joshua’s Farewell to the Leaders
1 After a long time had passed and the LORD had given Israel rest from all their enemies around them, Joshua, by then a very old man,
To say that God gave them rest also implies he was the cause of the unrest. Which of course is true.
2 summoned all Israel—their elders, leaders, judges and officials—and said to them: “I am very old.
And the earth is round. Oh, sorry, you don’t know that yet do you. Good ol’ God hasn’t told you.
3 You yourselves have seen everything the LORD your God has done to all these nations for your sake; it was the LORD your God who fought for you.
Fought? Are you freaking joking? Who would he have to fight? He just zaps you and you’re gone. That isn’t fighting. He allowed you to suffer, caused you even more suffering and still hasn’t even told you the earth is round. He’s giving you a hard time and laughing at you. You are nothing but a game, a group of people he can play with like children do with ants.
4 Remember how I have allotted as an inheritance for your tribes all the land of the nations that remain—the nations I conquered—between the Jordan and the Mediterranean Sea in the west.
5 The LORD your God himself will push them out for your sake. He will drive them out before you, and you will take possession of their land, as the LORD your God promised you.
Good to see some admission that it IS their land and that God himself is helping you steal it.
6 “Be very strong; be careful to obey all that is written in the Book of the Law of Moses, without turning aside to the right or to the left.
Do not turn left, do not turn right, do not pass go, do not collect 200 drachmas. Go directly to hell for all the evil acts you have committed.
7 Do not associate with these nations that remain among you; do not invoke the names of their gods or swear by them. You must not serve them or bow down to them.
No, keep right away from them. God doesn’t want you learning facts from people. How could he control you if you ever found out the truth?
8 But you are to hold fast to the LORD your God, as you have until now.
9 “The LORD has driven out before you great and powerful nations; to this day no one has been able to withstand you.
10 One of you routs a thousand, because the LORD your God fights for you, just as he promised.
11 So be very careful to love the LORD your God.
12 “But if you turn away and ally yourselves with the survivors of these nations that remain among you and if you intermarry with them and associate with them,
13 then you may be sure that the LORD your God will no longer drive out these nations before you. Instead, they will become snares and traps for you, whips on your backs and thorns in your eyes, until you perish from this good land, which the LORD your God has given you.
Well, they have done that and they are still there despite all your bullshit and bluster. Wake up dude, you’re a has been. You are superfluous to requirements. Go away!
14 “Now I am about to go the way of all the earth. You know with all your heart and soul that not one of all the good promises the LORD your God gave you has failed. Every promise has been fulfilled; not one has failed.
You keep thinking that if it makes you feel better. He’s killed millions of your own people, doesn’t talk to you when you really need it, forces you to mutilate your male children, makes you commit horrible crimes against innocent men, women and children. If there really is a compassionate, all loving god, then yours ain’t it! Wake up and smell the decomposing stench of the religion you follow.
15 But just as all the good things the LORD your God has promised you have come to you, so he will bring on you all the evil things he has threatened, until the LORD your God has destroyed you from this good land he has given you.
16 If you violate the covenant of the LORD your God, which he commanded you, and go and serve other gods and bow down to them, the LORD’s anger will burn against you, and you will quickly perish from the good land he has given you.”
Both these statements are obviously false. Plenty of ‘his people’ have violated this ridiculous covenant and they still live there. He has done nothing. Why do you think your parents tell you that you need to be asleep for the tooth fairy to come? Why do you need to be asleep for Santa to come? Because they are all made up! Fairy Tales. God is just one for the grown-ups as well.