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  • DistroMan 20:00 on September 16, 2010 Permalink
    Tags: , basin, , , Egypt, , , , , ,   

    Exodus 38: The Flight from Egypt 

    Exodus: Part 38 of 40

    The Altar of Burnt Offering

    Oh for shit sake. The doubled up descriptions of things like this that have no meaning whatsoever in a moral/ethical framework are completely unnecessary.  My guess is that it’s just fluff to bulk out the bible. And so it goes on, and on, and on…

    1 They built the altar of burnt offering of acacia wood, three cubits high; it was square, five cubits long and five cubits wide.

    2 They made a horn at each of the four corners, so that the horns and the altar were of one piece, and they overlaid the altar with bronze.

    3 They made all its utensils of bronze—its pots, shovels, sprinkling bowls, meat forks and firepans.

    4 They made a grating for the altar, a bronze network, to be under its ledge, halfway up the altar.

    5 They cast bronze rings to hold the poles for the four corners of the bronze grating.

    6 They made the poles of acacia wood and overlaid them with bronze.

    7 They inserted the poles into the rings so they would be on the sides of the altar for carrying it. They made it hollow, out of boards.

    Basin for Washing

    8 They made the bronze basin and its bronze stand from the mirrors of the women who served at the entrance to the Tent of Meeting.

    The Courtyard

    9 Next they made the courtyard. The south side was a hundred cubits long and had curtains of finely twisted linen,

    10 with twenty posts and twenty bronze bases, and with silver hooks and bands on the posts.

    11 The north side was also a hundred cubits long and had twenty posts and twenty bronze bases, with silver hooks and bands on the posts.

    12 The west end was fifty cubits wide and had curtains, with ten posts and ten bases, with silver hooks and bands on the posts.

    13 The east end, toward the sunrise, was also fifty cubits wide.

    14 Curtains fifteen cubits long were on one side of the entrance, with three posts and three bases,

    15 and curtains fifteen cubits long were on the other side of the entrance to the courtyard, with three posts and three bases.

    16 All the curtains around the courtyard were of finely twisted linen.

    17 The bases for the posts were bronze. The hooks and bands on the posts were silver, and their tops were overlaid with silver; so all the posts of the courtyard had silver bands.

    18 The curtain for the entrance to the courtyard was of blue, purple and scarlet yarn and finely twisted linen—the work of an embroiderer. It was twenty cubits long and, like the curtains of the courtyard, five cubits high,

    19 with four posts and four bronze bases. Their hooks and bands were silver, and their tops were overlaid with silver.

    20 All the tent pegs of the tabernacle and of the surrounding courtyard were bronze.

    The Materials Used

    21 These are the amounts of the materials used for the tabernacle, the tabernacle of the Testimony, which were recorded at Moses’ command by the Levites under the direction of Ithamar son of Aaron, the priest.

    22 (Bezalel son of Uri, the son of Hur, of the tribe of Judah, made everything the LORD commanded Moses;

    23 with him was Oholiab son of Ahisamach, of the tribe of Dan—a craftsman and designer, and an embroiderer in blue, purple and scarlet yarn and fine linen.)

    24 The total amount of the gold from the wave offering used for all the work on the sanctuary was 29 talents and 730 shekels, according to the sanctuary shekel.

    25 The silver obtained from those of the community who were counted in the census was 100 talents and 1,775 shekels, according to the sanctuary shekel-

    26 one beka per person, that is, half a shekel, according to the sanctuary shekel, from everyone who had crossed over to those counted, twenty years old or more, a total of 603,550 men.

    27 The 100 talents of silver were used to cast the bases for the sanctuary and for the curtain—100 bases from the 100 talents, one talent for each base.

    28 They used the 1,775 shekels to make the hooks for the posts, to overlay the tops of the posts, and to make their bands.

    29 The bronze from the wave offering was 70 talents and 2,400 shekels.

    30 They used it to make the bases for the entrance to the Tent of Meeting, the bronze altar with its bronze grating and all its utensils,

    31 the bases for the surrounding courtyard and those for its entrance and all the tent pegs for the tabernacle and those for the surrounding courtyard.

    << Exodus 37      Index      Exodus 39 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on September 15, 2010 Permalink
    Tags: Ark, , Egypt, , , , Incense, Lampstand, , Table   

    Exodus 37: The Flight from Egypt 

    Exodus: Part 37 of 40

    The Ark

    Now we have to put up with yet another rehash. This time we hear about how the Ark is to be made.

    1 Bezalel made the ark of acacia wood—two and a half cubits long, a cubit and a half wide, and a cubit and a half high.

    2 He overlaid it with pure gold, both inside and out, and made a gold molding around it.

    3 He cast four gold rings for it and fastened them to its four feet, with two rings on one side and two rings on the other.

    4 Then he made poles of acacia wood and overlaid them with gold.

    5 And he inserted the poles into the rings on the sides of the ark to carry it.

    6 He made the atonement cover of pure gold—two and a half cubits long and a cubit and a half wide.

    7 Then he made two cherubim out of hammered gold at the ends of the cover.

    8 He made one cherub on one end and the second cherub on the other; at the two ends he made them of one piece with the cover.

    9 The cherubim had their wings spread upward, overshadowing the cover with them. The cherubim faced each other, looking toward the cover.

    The Table

    10 They made the table of acacia wood—two cubits long, a cubit wide, and a cubit and a half high.

    11 Then they overlaid it with pure gold and made a gold molding around it.

    12 They also made around it a rim a handbreadth wide and put a gold molding on the rim.

    13 They cast four gold rings for the table and fastened them to the four corners, where the four legs were.

    14 The rings were put close to the rim to hold the poles used in carrying the table.

    15 The poles for carrying the table were made of acacia wood and were overlaid with gold.

    16 And they made from pure gold the articles for the table—its plates and dishes and bowls and its pitchers for the pouring out of drink offerings.

    The Lampstand

    17 They made the lampstand of pure gold and hammered it out, base and shaft; its flowerlike cups, buds and blossoms were of one piece with it.

    18 Six branches extended from the sides of the lampstand—three on one side and three on the other.

    19 Three cups shaped like almond flowers with buds and blossoms were on one branch, three on the next branch and the same for all six branches extending from the lampstand.

    20 And on the lampstand were four cups shaped like almond flowers with buds and blossoms.

    21 One bud was under the first pair of branches extending from the lampstand, a second bud under the second pair, and a third bud under the third pair—six branches in all.

    22 The buds and the branches were all of one piece with the lampstand, hammered out of pure gold.

    23 They made its seven lamps, as well as its wick trimmers and trays, of pure gold.

    24 They made the lampstand and all its accessories from one talent of pure gold.

    The Altar of Incense

    25 They made the altar of incense out of acacia wood. It was square, a cubit long and a cubit wide, and two cubits high —its horns of one piece with it.

    26 They overlaid the top and all the sides and the horns with pure gold, and made a gold molding around it.

    27 They made two gold rings below the molding—two on opposite sides—to hold the poles used to carry it.

    28 They made the poles of acacia wood and overlaid them with gold.

    29 They also made the sacred anointing oil and the pure, fragrant incense—the work of a perfumer.

    Blah, blah, blah…

    << Exodus 36      Index      Exodus 38 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on September 14, 2010 Permalink
    Tags: , , , Egypt, , , , , , , , , ,   

    Exodus 36: The Flight from Egypt 

    Exodus: Part 36 of 40

    1 So Bezalel, Oholiab and every skilled person to whom the LORD has given skill and ability to know how to carry out all the work of constructing the sanctuary are to do the work just as the LORD has commanded.”

    2 Then Moses summoned Bezalel and Oholiab and every skilled person to whom the LORD had given ability and who was willing to come and do the work.

    3 They received from Moses all the offerings the Israelites had brought to carry out the work of constructing the sanctuary. And the people continued to bring freewill offerings morning after morning.

    4 So all the skilled craftsmen who were doing all the work on the sanctuary left their work

    5 and said to Moses, “The people are bringing more than enough for doing the work the LORD commanded to be done.”

    6 Then Moses gave an order and they sent this word throughout the camp: “No man or woman is to make anything else as an offering for the sanctuary.” And so the people were restrained from bringing more,

    7 because what they already had was more than enough to do all the work.

    What happened to the extra?

    The Tabernacle

    The following is yet another rehash of the Tabernacle design etc.  Why they had to reproduce so many things is beyond me.  If they couldn’t think of enough good things to put in a book to teach people how to be good, they shouldn’t have even started.

    8 All the skilled men among the workmen made the tabernacle with ten curtains of finely twisted linen and blue, purple and scarlet yarn, with cherubim worked into them by a skilled craftsman.

    9 All the curtains were the same size—twenty-eight cubits long and four cubits wide.

    10 They joined five of the curtains together and did the same with the other five.

    11 Then they made loops of blue material along the edge of the end curtain in one set, and the same was done with the end curtain in the other set.

    12 They also made fifty loops on one curtain and fifty loops on the end curtain of the other set, with the loops opposite each other.

    13 Then they made fifty gold clasps and used them to fasten the two sets of curtains together so that the tabernacle was a unit.

    14 They made curtains of goat hair for the tent over the tabernacle—eleven altogether.

    15 All eleven curtains were the same size—thirty cubits long and four cubits wide.

    16 They joined five of the curtains into one set and the other six into another set.

    17 Then they made fifty loops along the edge of the end curtain in one set and also along the edge of the end curtain in the other set.

    18 They made fifty bronze clasps to fasten the tent together as a unit.

    19 Then they made for the tent a covering of ram skins dyed red, and over that a covering of hides of sea cows.

    20 They made upright frames of acacia wood for the tabernacle.

    21 Each frame was ten cubits long and a cubit and a half wide,

    22 with two projections set parallel to each other. They made all the frames of the tabernacle in this way.

    23 They made twenty frames for the south side of the tabernacle

    24 and made forty silver bases to go under them—two bases for each frame, one under each projection.

    25 For the other side, the north side of the tabernacle, they made twenty frames

    26 and forty silver bases—two under each frame.

    27 They made six frames for the far end, that is, the west end of the tabernacle,

    28 and two frames were made for the corners of the tabernacle at the far end.

    29 At these two corners the frames were double from the bottom all the way to the top and fitted into a single ring; both were made alike.

    30 So there were eight frames and sixteen silver bases—two under each frame.

    31 They also made crossbars of acacia wood: five for the frames on one side of the tabernacle,

    32 five for those on the other side, and five for the frames on the west, at the far end of the tabernacle.

    33 They made the center crossbar so that it extended from end to end at the middle of the frames.

    34 They overlaid the frames with gold and made gold rings to hold the crossbars. They also overlaid the crossbars with gold.

    35 They made the curtain of blue, purple and scarlet yarn and finely twisted linen, with cherubim worked into it by a skilled craftsman.

    36 They made four posts of acacia wood for it and overlaid them with gold. They made gold hooks for them and cast their four silver bases.

    37 For the entrance to the tent they made a curtain of blue, purple and scarlet yarn and finely twisted linen—the work of an embroiderer;

    38 and they made five posts with hooks for them. They overlaid the tops of the posts and their bands with gold and made their five bases of bronze.

    This is like eating bad leftovers for a whole week.  When do we get something good and new?

    << Exodus 35      Index      Exodus 37 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on September 13, 2010 Permalink
    Tags: , , Egypt, , , , , , , , , ,   

    Exodus 35: The Flight from Egypt 

    Exodus: Part 35 of 40

    Sabbath Regulations

    1 Moses assembled the whole Israelite community and said to them, “These are the things the LORD has commanded you to do:

    2 For six days, work is to be done, but the seventh day shall be your holy day, a Sabbath of rest to the LORD. Whoever does any work on it must be put to death.

    3 Do not light a fire in any of your dwellings on the Sabbath day.”

    How cold does it get over there?

    Materials for the Tabernacle

    4 Moses said to the whole Israelite community, “This is what the LORD has commanded:

    5 From what you have, take an offering for the LORD. Everyone who is willing is to bring to the LORD an offering of gold, silver and bronze;

    6 blue, purple and scarlet yarn and fine linen; goat hair;

    7 ram skins dyed red and hides of sea cows; acacia wood;

    8 olive oil for the light; spices for the anointing oil and for the fragrant incense;

    9 and onyx stones and other gems to be mounted on the ephod and breastpiece.

    10 “All who are skilled among you are to come and make everything the LORD has commanded:

    11 the tabernacle with its tent and its covering, clasps, frames, crossbars, posts and bases;

    12 the ark with its poles and the atonement cover and the curtain that shields it;

    13 the table with its poles and all its articles and the bread of the Presence;

    14 the lampstand that is for light with its accessories, lamps and oil for the light;

    15 the altar of incense with its poles, the anointing oil and the fragrant incense; the curtain for the doorway at the entrance to the tabernacle;

    16 the altar of burnt offering with its bronze grating, its poles and all its utensils; the bronze basin with its stand;

    17 the curtains of the courtyard with its posts and bases, and the curtain for the entrance to the courtyard;

    18 the tent pegs for the tabernacle and for the courtyard, and their ropes;

    19 the woven garments worn for ministering in the sanctuary—both the sacred garments for Aaron the priest and the garments for his sons when they serve as priests.”

    20 Then the whole Israelite community withdrew from Moses’ presence,

    21 and everyone who was willing and whose heart moved him came and brought an offering to the LORD for the work on the Tent of Meeting, for all its service, and for the sacred garments.

    22 All who were willing, men and women alike, came and brought gold jewelry of all kinds: brooches, earrings, rings and ornaments. They all presented their gold as a wave offering to the LORD.

    23 Everyone who had blue, purple or scarlet yarn or fine linen, or goat hair, ram skins dyed red or hides of sea cows brought them.

    24 Those presenting an offering of silver or bronze brought it as an offering to the LORD, and everyone who had acacia wood for any part of the work brought it.

    25 Every skilled woman spun with her hands and brought what she had spun—blue, purple or scarlet yarn or fine linen.

    26 And all the women who were willing and had the skill spun the goat hair.

    27 The leaders brought onyx stones and other gems to be mounted on the ephod and breastpiece.

    28 They also brought spices and olive oil for the light and for the anointing oil and for the fragrant incense.

    29 All the Israelite men and women who were willing brought to the LORD freewill offerings for all the work the LORD through Moses had commanded them to do.

    They brought everything the powermongers told them too because they were too afraid not to in case they were killed for not doing so.  Nobody loves through fear.

    Bezalel and Oholiab

    30 Then Moses said to the Israelites, “See, the LORD has chosen Bezalel son of Uri, the son of Hur, of the tribe of Judah,

    31 and he has filled him with the Spirit of God, with skill, ability and knowledge in all kinds of crafts-

    32 to make artistic designs for work in gold, silver and bronze,

    33 to cut and set stones, to work in wood and to engage in all kinds of artistic craftsmanship.

    34 And he has given both him and Oholiab son of Ahisamach, of the tribe of Dan, the ability to teach others.

    35 He has filled them with skill to do all kinds of work as craftsmen, designers, embroiderers in blue, purple and scarlet yarn and fine linen, and weavers—all of them master craftsmen and designers.

    With all this power to give people so much, he only gives to a select few and punishes everyone else for no reason. It’s a sad commentary on today’s society that some people think this is a sign of moral behaviour.

    << Exodus 34      Index      Exodus 36 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on September 12, 2010 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , Egypt, , , , , , , , , ,   

    Exodus 34: The Flight from Egypt 

    Exodus: Part 34 of 40

    The New Stone Tablets

    1 The LORD said to Moses, “Chisel out two stone tablets like the first ones, and I will write on them the words that were on the first tablets, which you broke.

    Why not just make another set?  If making Moses do it again is a punishment, then say so.

    2 Be ready in the morning, and then come up on Mount Sinai. Present yourself to me there on top of the mountain.

    3 No one is to come with you or be seen anywhere on the mountain; not even the flocks and herds may graze in front of the mountain.”

    Then just make the flocks unable to go past whatever arbitrary boundary you wish to set.  Why make others do your work?

    4 So Moses chiseled out two stone tablets like the first ones and went up Mount Sinai early in the morning, as the LORD had commanded him; and he carried the two stone tablets in his hands.

    5 Then the LORD came down in the cloud and stood there with him and proclaimed his name, the LORD.

    God stands there with him, but doesn’t want him to see his face? Yeah, good luck with that.

    6 And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, “The LORD, the LORD, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness,

    There are no words I can think of that would describe the complete loss of words I felt when I read that.  Dumfounded doesn’t even come close. Gobsmacked doesn’t suffice either.  Ten thousand facepalms might come close.  Might.

    7 maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation.”

    How can anyone say they forgive wickedness and punish the guilty in the same breath?  Then to admit they punish innocent children for imagined sins they didn’t commit.  Ten million gobsmacked, dumfounded facepalms!!!

    8 Moses bowed to the ground at once and worshiped.

    Anyone who would worship this sack of shit is no better than they are. This ‘god’ is a lying, murderous, bloodthirsty, genocidal, egomaniacal, narcissistic, sonofabitch, and he’s getting off easy with that description.

    9 “O Lord, if I have found favor in your eyes,” he said, “then let the Lord go with us. Although this is a stiff-necked people, forgive our wickedness and our sin, and take us as your inheritance.”

    10 Then the LORD said: “I am making a covenant with you. Before all your people I will do wonders never before done in any nation in all the world. The people you live among will see how awesome is the work that I, the LORD, will do for you.

    Gonna pluck a rabbit out of a hat?

    11 Obey what I command you today. I will drive out before you the Amorites, Canaanites, Hittites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites.

    Why? What have they done to deserve this?

    12 Be careful not to make a treaty with those who live in the land where you are going, or they will be a snare among you.

    Why can’t God make them good people and treat them better?

    13 Break down their altars, smash their sacred stones and cut down their Asherah poles.

    14 Do not worship any other god, for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God.

    Jealousy is a sin!!!!

    15 “Be careful not to make a treaty with those who live in the land; for when they prostitute themselves to their gods and sacrifice to them, they will invite you and you will eat their sacrifices.

    You admit there are other gods?  What happened to you being the only god?

    16 And when you choose some of their daughters as wives for your sons and those daughters prostitute themselves to their gods, they will lead your sons to do the same.

    Lovely imagery there God.

    17 “Do not make cast idols.

    Make them out of wood.

    18 “Celebrate the Feast of Unleavened Bread. For seven days eat bread made without yeast, as I commanded you. Do this at the appointed time in the month of Abib, for in that month you came out of Egypt.

    Still no reason for not using yeast.

    19 “The first offspring of every womb belongs to me, including all the firstborn males of your livestock, whether from herd or flock.

    In what way? Are you going to eat them? Just kill them? Make them wear funny clothes and wave bits of meat around?

    20 Redeem the firstborn donkey with a lamb, but if you do not redeem it, break its neck. Redeem all your firstborn sons. “No one is to appear before me empty-handed.

    And if they do?

    21 “Six days you shall labor, but on the seventh day you shall rest; even during the plowing season and harvest you must rest.

    Yeah, leave your crops in the ground and let them rot while you rest. Don’t worry that your children might starve to death. Not a problem for God.

    22 “Celebrate the Feast of Weeks with the firstfruits of the wheat harvest, and the Feast of Ingathering at the turn of the year.

    23 Three times a year all your men are to appear before the Sovereign LORD, the God of Israel.

    24 I will drive out nations before you and enlarge your territory, and no one will covet your land when you go up three times each year to appear before the LORD your God.

    25 “Do not offer the blood of a sacrifice to me along with anything containing yeast, and do not let any of the sacrifice from the Passover Feast remain until morning.

    Why are you so worried about yeast?  Is it your Kryptonite?  Hmmmmm?

    26 “Bring the best of the firstfruits of your soil to the house of the LORD your God.
    “Do not cook a young goat in its mother’s milk.”

    Yeah, give God the best because he doesn’t think you deserve the fruits of your own labour.

    27 Then the LORD said to Moses, “Write down these words, for in accordance with these words I have made a covenant with you and with Israel.”

    28 Moses was there with the LORD forty days and forty nights without eating bread or drinking water. And he wrote on the tablets the words of the covenant—the Ten Commandments.

    It took forty days and nights to do just ten lousy commandments?  I know he was using a chisel, but sheesh, talk about slow.  Not to mention most of them weren’t worth wasting your time on.

    The Radiant Face of Moses

    29 When Moses came down from Mount Sinai with the two tablets of the Testimony in his hands, he was not aware that his face was radiant because he had spoken with the LORD.

    Godburn.  He forgot his GPF99999999999999.

    30 When Aaron and all the Israelites saw Moses, his face was radiant, and they were afraid to come near him.

    31 But Moses called to them; so Aaron and all the leaders of the community came back to him, and he spoke to them.

    32 Afterward all the Israelites came near him, and he gave them all the commands the LORD had given him on Mount Sinai.

    Forty days and nights for God to articulate just 341 words? Maybe the language they used took more so let’s be nice and say 1000 words.  Still, forty days and nights?

    33 When Moses finished speaking to them, he put a veil over his face.

    34 But whenever he entered the LORD’s presence to speak with him, he removed the veil until he came out. And when he came out and told the Israelites what he had been commanded,

    35 they saw that his face was radiant. Then Moses would put the veil back over his face until he went in to speak with the LORD.

    Veil fetish?

    << Exodus 33      Index      Exodus 35 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on September 11, 2010 Permalink
    Tags: , , , Egypt, , , , , , , , , , ,   

    Exodus 33: The Flight from Egypt 

    Exodus: Part 33 of 40

    1 Then the LORD said to Moses, “Leave this place, you and the people you brought up out of Egypt, and go up to the land I promised on oath to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, saying, ‘I will give it to your descendants.’

    Except those you had slaughtered.

    2 I will send an angel before you and drive out the Canaanites, Amorites, Hittites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites.

    Why?  It’s their land.

    3 Go up to the land flowing with milk and honey. But I will not go with you, because you are a stiff-necked people and I might destroy you on the way.”

    Insults and veiled threats?  Lovely.

    4 When the people heard these distressing words, they began to mourn and no one put on any ornaments.

    5 For the LORD had said to Moses, “Tell the Israelites, ‘You are a stiff-necked people. If I were to go with you even for a moment, I might destroy you. Now take off your ornaments and I will decide what to do with you.’ “

    6 So the Israelites stripped off their ornaments at Mount Horeb.

    When do we hear about the Wobbly Necked people?

    The Tent of Meeting

    7 Now Moses used to take a tent and pitch it outside the camp some distance away, calling it the “tent of meeting.” Anyone inquiring of the LORD would go to the tent of meeting outside the camp.

    8 And whenever Moses went out to the tent, all the people rose and stood at the entrances to their tents, watching Moses until he entered the tent.

    9 As Moses went into the tent, the pillar of cloud would come down and stay at the entrance, while the LORD spoke with Moses.

    Moses didn’t write any of this. It wasn’t written down at the time. It wasn’t written down by anyone who was there, but it was written after all that were there were dead.  So how did they know all these details?

    10 Whenever the people saw the pillar of cloud standing at the entrance to the tent, they all stood and worshiped, each at the entrance to his tent.

    11 The LORD would speak to Moses face to face, as a man speaks with his friend. Then Moses would return to the camp, but his young aide Joshua son of Nun did not leave the tent.

    Moses and the Glory of the LORD

    12 Moses said to the LORD, “You have been telling me, ‘Lead these people,’ but you have not let me know whom you will send with me. You have said, ‘I know you by name and you have found favor with me.’

    Not completely true either.  God allowed thousands to be killed.  They certainly were not in favour with him.

    13 If you are pleased with me, teach me your ways so I may know you and continue to find favor with you. Remember that this nation is your people.”

    Hahahaha, Moses is telling God what to do and reminding him of things said in the past.

    14 The LORD replied, “My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”

    15 Then Moses said to him, “If your Presence does not go with us, do not send us up from here.

    Way to go Moses. Argue with the bossman.

    16 How will anyone know that you are pleased with me and with your people unless you go with us? What else will distinguish me and your people from all the other people on the face of the earth?”

    God just said he would be going and yet Moses still argues? Smite him God, smite him!

    17 And the LORD said to Moses, “I will do the very thing you have asked, because I am pleased with you and I know you by name.”

    18 Then Moses said, “Now show me your glory.”

    Yeah God, let it all hang out.  :)

    19 And the LORD said, “I will cause all my goodness to pass in front of you, and I will proclaim my name, the LORD, in your presence. I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion.

    Proclaim his name?

    God, Lord God!

    <cue James Bond music>

    20 But,” he said, “you cannot see my face, for no one may see me and live.”

    He’s already seen his face. Go back up to 11 and you’ll see that it says “The LORD would speak to Moses face to face, as a man speaks with his friend.” This story never gets any better does it.

    21 Then the LORD said, “There is a place near me where you may stand on a rock.

    It’s a stony desert, there are millions of places to stand on rocks.

    22 When my glory passes by, I will put you in a cleft in the rock and cover you with my hand until I have passed by.

    Why not just do it invisibly if you are so all powerful?  Why keep being such a drama queen about everything?

    23 Then I will remove my hand and you will see my back; but my face must not be seen.”

    Ugly much?

    << Exodus 32      Index      Exodus 34 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on September 10, 2010 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , Egypt, , , , , , , , , , , , , slaughter   

    Exodus 32: The Flight from Egypt 

    Exodus: Part 32 of 40

    The Golden Calf

    1 When the people saw that Moses was so long in coming down from the mountain, they gathered around Aaron and said, “Come, make us gods who will go before us. As for this fellow Moses who brought us up out of Egypt, we don’t know what has happened to him.”

    Make no idols ring a bell people?

    2 Aaron answered them, “Take off the gold earrings that your wives, your sons and your daughters are wearing, and bring them to me.”

    3 So all the people took off their earrings and brought them to Aaron.

    4 He took what they handed him and made it into an idol cast in the shape of a calf, fashioning it with a tool. Then they said, “These are your gods, O Israel, who brought you up out of Egypt.”

    Gods?  Plural?  WTF?

    5 When Aaron saw this, he built an altar in front of the calf and announced, “Tomorrow there will be a festival to the LORD.”

    6 So the next day the people rose early and sacrificed burnt offerings and presented fellowship offerings. Afterward they sat down to eat and drink and got up to indulge in revelry.

    7 Then the LORD said to Moses, “Go down, because your people, whom you brought up out of Egypt, have become corrupt.

    Aaron’s fault.  Let’s get him.  Stone the sonofabitch!!!

    8 They have been quick to turn away from what I commanded them and have made themselves an idol cast in the shape of a calf. They have bowed down to it and sacrificed to it and have said, ‘These are your gods, O Israel, who brought you up out of Egypt.’

    Is this any different to the idols of Jebus in churches that everyone keeps bowing down to and praying?

    9 “I have seen these people,” the LORD said to Moses, “and they are a stiff-necked people.

    10 Now leave me alone so that my anger may burn against them and that I may destroy them. Then I will make you into a great nation.”

    Yeah, yeah, we’ve all heard that before.  It’s just kill, kill, kill with you isn’t it!

    11 But Moses sought the favor of the LORD his God. “O LORD,” he said, “why should your anger burn against your people, whom you brought out of Egypt with great power and a mighty hand?

    12 Why should the Egyptians say, ‘It was with evil intent that he brought them out, to kill them in the mountains and to wipe them off the face of the earth’? Turn from your fierce anger; relent and do not bring disaster on your people.

    Yeah, you tell him Moses.  Don’t let him push you around.  Who does he think he is? God?

    13 Remember your servants Abraham, Isaac and Israel, to whom you swore by your own self: ‘I will make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and I will give your descendants all this land I promised them, and it will be their inheritance forever.’ “

    14 Then the LORD relented and did not bring on his people the disaster he had threatened.

    Ridiculous crap. The LORD would have known that Moses would say that and would have relented before he even made the threat.  This of course means that it was an empty threat to begin with, which also means it was a lie.  Good going God, you mythical lying sonofabitch.

    15 Moses turned and went down the mountain with the two tablets of the Testimony in his hands. They were inscribed on both sides, front and back.

    16 The tablets were the work of God; the writing was the writing of God, engraved on the tablets.

    17 When Joshua heard the noise of the people shouting, he said to Moses, “There is the sound of war in the camp.”

    18 Moses replied:
    “It is not the sound of victory,
    it is not the sound of defeat;
    it is the sound of singing that I hear.”

    Was Joshua deaf or something?

    19 When Moses approached the camp and saw the calf and the dancing, his anger burned and he threw the tablets out of his hands, breaking them to pieces at the foot of the mountain.

    Bad tempered moron.  Where is all the goodness we’re supposed to expect from this idiot book?

    20 And he took the calf they had made and burned it in the fire; then he ground it to powder, scattered it on the water and made the Israelites drink it.

    21 He said to Aaron, “What did these people do to you, that you led them into such great sin?”

    22 “Do not be angry, my lord,” Aaron answered. “You know how prone these people are to evil.

    23 They said to me, ‘Make us gods who will go before us. As for this fellow Moses who brought us up out of Egypt, we don’t know what has happened to him.’

    24 So I told them, ‘Whoever has any gold jewelry, take it off.’ Then they gave me the gold, and I threw it into the fire, and out came this calf!”

    25 Moses saw that the people were running wild and that Aaron had let them get out of control and so become a laughingstock to their enemies.

    26 So he stood at the entrance to the camp and said, “Whoever is for the LORD, come to me.” And all the Levites rallied to him.

    27 Then he said to them, “This is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: ‘Each man strap a sword to his side. Go back and forth through the camp from one end to the other, each killing his brother and friend and neighbor.’ “

    God never said that.

    28 The Levites did as Moses commanded, and that day about three thousand of the people died.

    The compassion and forgiveness is overwhelming.  My heart bursts with love.  NOT!!!

    29 Then Moses said, “You have been set apart to the LORD today, for you were against your own sons and brothers, and he has blessed you this day.”

    Yeah, I guess that is the sort of thing he would like.

    30 The next day Moses said to the people, “You have committed a great sin. But now I will go up to the LORD; perhaps I can make atonement for your sin.”

    Wasn’t killing their brothers and sons enough atonement?

    31 So Moses went back to the LORD and said, “Oh, what a great sin these people have committed! They have made themselves gods of gold.

    32 But now, please forgive their sin—but if not, then blot me out of the book you have written.”

    33 The LORD replied to Moses, “Whoever has sinned against me I will blot out of my book.

    34 Now go, lead the people to the place I spoke of, and my angel will go before you. However, when the time comes for me to punish, I will punish them for their sin.”

    The ones who sinned are dead aren’t they?  What gives here?

    35 And the LORD struck the people with a plague because of what they did with the calf Aaron had made.

    So all those who were killed, three thousand of them, were killed for no reason at all?  Again, it is becoming very hard for me to express my feelings in words other than ones I don’t wish to use on my blog.  I’m horrified by the violence and the way that violence is committed by the people in this book.  To trust one person who says that ‘God’ told him to kill three thousand people to the point of actually slaughtering them all, family and friends, is beyond comprehension.

    << Exodus 31      Index      Exodus 33 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on September 9, 2010 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , Egypt, , , , , , , , , , , , sabbath,   

    Exodus 31: The Flight from Egypt 

    Exodus: Part 31 of 40

    Bezalel and Oholiab

    1 Then the LORD said to Moses,

    For starters, you talk too much!

    2 “See, I have chosen Bezalel son of Uri, the son of Hur, of the tribe of Judah,

    3 and I have filled him with the Spirit of God, with skill, ability and knowledge in all kinds of crafts-

    4 to make artistic designs for work in gold, silver and bronze,

    5 to cut and set stones, to work in wood, and to engage in all kinds of craftsmanship.

    Most probably only so he can do that kind of work for you.  Why not make everyone ‘good’ at their jobs?

    6 Moreover, I have appointed Oholiab son of Ahisamach, of the tribe of Dan, to help him. Also I have given skill to all the craftsmen to make everything I have commanded you:

    7 the Tent of Meeting, the ark of the Testimony with the atonement cover on it, and all the other furnishings of the tent-

    8 the table and its articles, the pure gold lampstand and all its accessories, the altar of incense,

    9 the altar of burnt offering and all its utensils, the basin with its stand-

    10 and also the woven garments, both the sacred garments for Aaron the priest and the garments for his sons when they serve as priests,

    11 and the anointing oil and fragrant incense for the Holy Place. They are to make them just as I commanded you.”

    Blah, blah, blah!  Stuff and nonsense.  What has this got to do with goodness, bettering ourselves and caring for each other?

    The Sabbath

    12 Then the LORD said to Moses,

    13 “Say to the Israelites, ‘You must observe my Sabbaths. This will be a sign between me and you for the generations to come, so you may know that I am the LORD, who makes you holy.

    14 ” ‘Observe the Sabbath, because it is holy to you. Anyone who desecrates it must be put to death; whoever does any work on that day must be cut off from his people.

    Murderous bastard.

    15 For six days, work is to be done, but the seventh day is a Sabbath of rest, holy to the LORD. Whoever does any work on the Sabbath day must be put to death.

    16 The Israelites are to observe the Sabbath, celebrating it for the generations to come as a lasting covenant.

    17 It will be a sign between me and the Israelites forever, for in six days the LORD made the heavens and the earth, and on the seventh day he abstained from work and rested.’ “

    I don’t understand why anyone else on earth is bothering with this insanity when it was obviously written only for the Israelites.

    18 When the LORD finished speaking to Moses on Mount Sinai, he gave him the two tablets of the Testimony, the tablets of stone inscribed by the finger of God.

    Which contained even more rubbish. It’s not that there aren’t any good things in them, but they are only things already known to man well before this idiot book was written.

    << Exodus 30      Index      Exodus 32 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on September 8, 2010 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , Egypt, , , , , , , , , ,   

    Exodus 30: The Flight from Egypt 

    Exodus: Part 30 of 40

    The Altar of Incense

    1 “Make an altar of acacia wood for burning incense.

    2 It is to be square, a cubit long and a cubit wide, and two cubits high—its horns of one piece with it.

    3 Overlay the top and all the sides and the horns with pure gold, and make a gold molding around it.

    4 Make two gold rings for the altar below the molding—two on opposite sides—to hold the poles used to carry it.

    5 Make the poles of acacia wood and overlay them with gold.

    6 Put the altar in front of the curtain that is before the ark of the Testimony—before the atonement cover that is over the Testimony—where I will meet with you.

    7 “Aaron must burn fragrant incense on the altar every morning when he tends the lamps.

    8 He must burn incense again when he lights the lamps at twilight so incense will burn regularly before the LORD for the generations to come.

    9 Do not offer on this altar any other incense or any burnt offering or grain offering, and do not pour a drink offering on it.

    10 Once a year Aaron shall make atonement on its horns. This annual atonement must be made with the blood of the atoning sin offering for the generations to come. It is most holy to the LORD.”

    It is becoming harder to keep commenting on this rubbish because I’ve called it most everything I can without swearing too much.  The stupidity of this book is highly frustrating when you try to comment on it every day.  How many times and in how many ways can you say that it’s a load of crap?  It’s absolute lunacy and anyone, and I do mean anyone, who follows this shit, needs serious counselling.  The priests need behaviour modification at a serious level if they really believe this rubbish.  Even if they don’t, then they should be jailed, exiled, or in some way seriously punished for putting others psychological wellbeing at risk.

    Atonement Money

    11 Then the LORD said to Moses,

    12 “When you take a census of the Israelites to count them, each one must pay the LORD a ransom for his life at the time he is counted. Then no plague will come on them when you number them.

    Out and out friggin’ blackmail.  Any religions basing themselves on this behaviour should be drummed out of existence.

    13 Each one who crosses over to those already counted is to give a half shekel, according to the sanctuary shekel, which weighs twenty gerahs. This half shekel is an offering to the LORD.

    14 All who cross over, those twenty years old or more, are to give an offering to the LORD.

    One shekel for every three farts and and extra if you shit accidentally.

    15 The rich are not to give more than a half shekel and the poor are not to give less when you make the offering to the LORD to atone for your lives.

    There you go, the Lord is just looking after the rich here.  So much for them looking after the poor.

    16 Receive the atonement money from the Israelites and use it for the service of the Tent of Meeting. It will be a memorial for the Israelites before the LORD, making atonement for your lives.”

    Blackmail on your part and bribery on their part.

    Basin for Washing

    17 Then the LORD said to Moses,

    18 “Make a bronze basin, with its bronze stand, for washing. Place it between the Tent of Meeting and the altar, and put water in it.

    19 Aaron and his sons are to wash their hands and feet with water from it.

    20 Whenever they enter the Tent of Meeting, they shall wash with water so that they will not die. Also, when they approach the altar to minister by presenting an offering made to the LORD by fire,

    21 they shall wash their hands and feet so that they will not die. This is to be a lasting ordinance for Aaron and his descendants for the generations to come.”

    Head >>> Desk!!!

    Anointing Oil

    22 Then the LORD said to Moses,

    23 “Take the following fine spices: 500 shekels of liquid myrrh, half as much (that is, 250 shekels) of fragrant cinnamon, 250 shekels of fragrant cane,

    24 500 shekels of cassia—all according to the sanctuary shekel—and a hin of olive oil.

    25 Make these into a sacred anointing oil, a fragrant blend, the work of a perfumer. It will be the sacred anointing oil.

    26 Then use it to anoint the Tent of Meeting, the ark of the Testimony,

    27 the table and all its articles, the lampstand and its accessories, the altar of incense,

    28 the altar of burnt offering and all its utensils, and the basin with its stand.

    29 You shall consecrate them so they will be most holy, and whatever touches them will be holy.

    30 “Anoint Aaron and his sons and consecrate them so they may serve me as priests.

    31 Say to the Israelites, ‘This is to be my sacred anointing oil for the generations to come.

    32 Do not pour it on men’s bodies and do not make any oil with the same formula. It is sacred, and you are to consider it sacred.

    33 Whoever makes perfume like it and whoever puts it on anyone other than a priest must be cut off from his people.’ “

    Put a little bit behind your ears too.  It will cover up the smell from the shit that’s in your head.

    Incense

    34 Then the LORD said to Moses, “Take fragrant spices—gum resin, onycha and galbanum—and pure frankincense, all in equal amounts,

    35 and make a fragrant blend of incense, the work of a perfumer. It is to be salted and pure and sacred.

    36 Grind some of it to powder and place it in front of the Testimony in the Tent of Meeting, where I will meet with you. It shall be most holy to you.

    37 Do not make any incense with this formula for yourselves; consider it holy to the LORD.

    38 Whoever makes any like it to enjoy its fragrance must be cut off from his people.”

    If it would get them cut off from you they might just get right to work making their own.  At least they’d get to keep the fruits of their labour instead of having a fruitcake like you keeping or burning everything in sight.

    It boggles the mind that modern day fruitloops still believe in this rubbish that was quite obviously only intended to keep the people under their thumb and to rip them off.

    << Exodus 29      Index      Exodus 31 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on September 7, 2010 Permalink
    Tags: , , , Egypt, , , , , , ,   

    Exodus 29: The Flight from Egypt 

    Exodus: Part 29 of 40

    Consecration of the Priests

    1 “This is what you are to do to consecrate them, so they may serve me as priests: Take a young bull and two rams without defect.

    Who created ‘everything’?  Who made them with defects?  So much for a perfect being.

    2 And from fine wheat flour, without yeast, make bread, and cakes mixed with oil, and wafers spread with oil.

    What is the problem he has with yeast all the time?

    3 Put them in a basket and present them in it—along with the bull and the two rams.

    Bread, cakes, wafers, a bull and two rams in a basket?  Freakin’ big basket!!!

    4 Then bring Aaron and his sons to the entrance to the Tent of Meeting and wash them with water.

    Men washing men?  I thought that kind of carrying on was against his law?  Oh, sorry, this is priests isn’t it.  They have a completely different set of rules than we do.

    5 Take the garments and dress Aaron with the tunic, the robe of the ephod, the ephod itself and the breastpiece. Fasten the ephod on him by its skillfully woven waistband.

    6 Put the turban on his head and attach the sacred diadem to the turban.

    7 Take the anointing oil and anoint him by pouring it on his head.

    All of it?

    8 Bring his sons and dress them in tunics

    9 and put headbands on them. Then tie sashes on Aaron and his sons. The priesthood is theirs by a lasting ordinance. In this way you shall ordain Aaron and his sons.

    So this is where the priesthood got the idea that once they are priests they will always be priests no matter what atrocious crimes they commit.

    10 “Bring the bull to the front of the Tent of Meeting, and Aaron and his sons shall lay their hands on its head.

    11 Slaughter it in the LORD’s presence at the entrance to the Tent of Meeting.

    Nothing like a good bit of bloodletting to put ones god in a good mood.

    12 Take some of the bull’s blood and put it on the horns of the altar with your finger, and pour out the rest of it at the base of the altar.

    That poor bull did not deserve to be treated like that.

    13 Then take all the fat around the inner parts, the covering of the liver, and both kidneys with the fat on them, and burn them on the altar.

    14 But burn the bull’s flesh and its hide and its offal outside the camp. It is a sin offering.

    Wasted food and a wasted life.  Can I go to church each week and leave some old smelly offal outside the doors?

    15 “Take one of the rams, and Aaron and his sons shall lay their hands on its head.

    16 Slaughter it and take the blood and sprinkle it against the altar on all sides.

    Oh wonderful.  More wasted life.  More inhumane actions and all at the request of a supposed compassionate being.

    17 Cut the ram into pieces and wash the inner parts and the legs, putting them with the head and the other pieces.

    18 Then burn the entire ram on the altar. It is a burnt offering to the LORD, a pleasing aroma, an offering made to the LORD by fire.

    If it’s all going to be burnt, what is the need to cut it up?

    19 “Take the other ram, and Aaron and his sons shall lay their hands on its head.

    20 Slaughter it, take some of its blood and put it on the lobes of the right ears of Aaron and his sons, on the thumbs of their right hands, and on the big toes of their right feet. Then sprinkle blood against the altar on all sides.

    21 And take some of the blood on the altar and some of the anointing oil and sprinkle it on Aaron and his garments and on his sons and their garments. Then he and his sons and their garments will be consecrated.

    22 “Take from this ram the fat, the fat tail, the fat around the inner parts, the covering of the liver, both kidneys with the fat on them, and the right thigh. (This is the ram for the ordination.)

    23 From the basket of bread made without yeast, which is before the LORD, take a loaf, and a cake made with oil, and a wafer.

    24 Put all these in the hands of Aaron and his sons and wave them before the LORD as a wave offering.

    Men dressed up in gaudy costumes with turbans, walking around with blood on their toes and hands waving dead animal parts.  God has weird ways of getting his jollies.

    25 Then take them from their hands and burn them on the altar along with the burnt offering for a pleasing aroma to the LORD, an offering made to the LORD by fire.

    There is absolutely no sense to any of this bullshit.  No god worth the name would want this kind of crap to be performed in their honour.  It is nothing but the imaginings from the minds of superstitious fools who knew no better.  For this to be carried on through the centuries and to have people still believing this shit is beyond me.  I am absolutely sure that if the freaking morons ever actually picked up a flipping bible and read it, they would have to at the very least question their faith.  A huge amount would have to leave the church.

    26 After you take the breast of the ram for Aaron’s ordination, wave it before the LORD as a wave offering, and it will be your share.

    Wave offering?  Excuse me while I bang my head on the desk for a second.

    27 “Consecrate those parts of the ordination ram that belong to Aaron and his sons: the breast that was waved and the thigh that was presented.

    28 This is always to be the regular share from the Israelites for Aaron and his sons. It is the contribution the Israelites are to make to the LORD from their fellowship offerings.

    29 “Aaron’s sacred garments will belong to his descendants so that they can be anointed and ordained in them.

    30 The son who succeeds him as priest and comes to the Tent of Meeting to minister in the Holy Place is to wear them seven days.

    31 “Take the ram for the ordination and cook the meat in a sacred place.

    32 At the entrance to the Tent of Meeting, Aaron and his sons are to eat the meat of the ram and the bread that is in the basket.

    33 They are to eat these offerings by which atonement was made for their ordination and consecration. But no one else may eat them, because they are sacred.

    Burnt dead sheep is burnt dead sheep.  IT IS NOT SACRED.  Nothing is sacred other than life itself.

    34 And if any of the meat of the ordination ram or any bread is left over till morning, burn it up. It must not be eaten, because it is sacred.

    35 “Do for Aaron and his sons everything I have commanded you, taking seven days to ordain them.

    36 Sacrifice a bull each day as a sin offering to make atonement. Purify the altar by making atonement for it, and anoint it to consecrate it.

    More innocent animals losing their lives just to have the meat burnt and wasted.

    37 For seven days make atonement for the altar and consecrate it. Then the altar will be most holy, and whatever touches it will be holy.

    After all the blood poured on it, anyone touching it will most probably end up diseased.

    38 “This is what you are to offer on the altar regularly each day: two lambs a year old.

    39 Offer one in the morning and the other at twilight.

    40 With the first lamb offer a tenth of an ephah of fine flour mixed with a quarter of a hin of oil from pressed olives, and a quarter of a hin of wine as a drink offering.

    41 Sacrifice the other lamb at twilight with the same grain offering and its drink offering as in the morning—a pleasing aroma, an offering made to the LORD by fire.

    42 “For the generations to come this burnt offering is to be made regularly at the entrance to the Tent of Meeting before the LORD. There I will meet you and speak to you;

    Thousands of animals losing their life for no reason whatsoever.

    43 there also I will meet with the Israelites, and the place will be consecrated by my glory.

    44 “So I will consecrate the Tent of Meeting and the altar and will consecrate Aaron and his sons to serve me as priests.

    45 Then I will dwell among the Israelites and be their God.

    46 They will know that I am the LORD their God, who brought them out of Egypt so that I might dwell among them. I am the LORD their God.

    How about explaining what these so called priests are supposed to do other than dress funny and waste much needed resources and lives.

    << Exodus 28      Index      Exodus 30 >>

     

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