Tagged: Ezra Toggle Comment Threads | Keyboard Shortcuts

  • DistroMan 20:00 on February 29, 2012 Permalink
    Tags: Chronicles, , , , Ezra, , index, , , , Kings, , , , , ,   

    Distro’s Bible Commentary: An Index 

    Warning: The Bible is a work of fiction and should not be taken literally. It contains verses descriptive of, or advocating suicide, incest, bestiality, sadomasochism, sexual activity in a violet manner, murder, morbid violence, use of drugs or alcohol, homosexuality, voyeurism, revenge, animal cruelty, undermining of authority figures, lawlessness and human rights violations and atrocities.

    Exposure to contents for extended periods of time or during formative years in children may cause delusions, hallucinations, decreased cognitive and objective reasoning abilities, and, in extreme cases, pathological disorders, hatred, bigotry and violence including but not limited to fanaticism, murder and genocide.

    Genesis – Exodus – Leviticus – Numbers – Deuteronomy – Joshua – Judges – Ruth – 1-Samuel – 2 Samuel – 1 Kings – 2 Kings – 1 Chronicles – 2 Chronicles – Ezra – Nehemiah – Esther – Job – Psalms – Proverbs – Ecclesiastes – Song of Solomon – Isaiah – Jeremiah – Lamentations – Ezekiel – Daniel – Hosea – Joel – Amos – Obadiah – Jonah – Micah – Nahum – Habakkuk – Zephaniah – Haggai – Zechariah – Malachi – Matthew – Mark – Luke – John – Acts – Romans – 1 Corinthians – 2 Corinthians – Galatians – Ephesians – Philippians – Colossians – 1 Thessalonians – 2 Thessalonians – 1 Timothy – 2 Timothy – Titus – Philemon – Hebrews – James – 1 Peter – 2 Peter – 1 John – 2 John – 3 John – Jude – Revelation

    Genesis

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20

    21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – 32 – 33 – 34 – 35 – 36 – 37 – 38 – 39 – 40

    41 – 42 – 43 – 44 – 45 – 46 – 47 – 48 – 49 – 50 – My thoughts on Genesis

    Exodus

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – 32 – 33 – 34 – 35 – 36 – 37 – 38 – 39 – 40 – My thoughts on Exodus

    Leviticus

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – My thoughts on Leviticus

    Numbers

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – 32 – 33 – 34 – 35 – 36 – My thoughts on Numbers

    Deuteronomy

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – 32 – 33 – 34 – My thoughts on Deuteronomy

    Joshua

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – My thoughts on Joshua

    Judges

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – My thoughts on Judges

    Ruth

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – My thoughts on Ruth

    1-Samuel

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – My thoughts on 1-Samuel

    2-Samuel

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – My thoughts on 2-Samuel

    1-Kings

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – My thoughts on 1-Kings

    2-Kings

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – My thoughts on 2-Kings

    1-Chronicles

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – My thoughts on 1-Chronicles

    2-Chronicles

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – 32 – 33 – 34 – 35 – 36 – My thoughts on 2-Chronicles

    Ezra

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – My thoughts on Ezra

    Nehemiah

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – My thoughts on Nehemiah

    Esther

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – My thoughts on Esther

    Job

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – 32 – 33 – 34 – 35 – 36 – 37 – 38 – 39 – 40 – 41 – 42 – My thoughts on Job

    Psalms

    1 – 2 – 3 – 4 – 5 – 6 – 7 – 8 – 9 – 10 – 11 – 12 – 13 – 14 – 15 – 16 – 17 – 18 – 19 – 20 – 21 – 22 – 23 – 24 – 25 – 26 – 27 – 28 – 29 – 30 – 31 – 32 – 33 – 34 – 35 – 36 – 37 – 38 – 39 – 40 – 41 – 42 – 43 – 44 – 45 – 46 – 47 – 48 – 49 – 50 – 51 – 52 – 53 – 54 – 55 – 56 – 57 – 58 – 59 – 60 – 61 – 62 – 63 – 64 – 65 – 66 – 67 – 68 – 69 – 70 – 71 – 72 – 73 – 74 – 75 – 76 – 77 – 78 – 79 – 80 – 81 – 82 – 83 – 84 – 85 – 86 – 87 – 88 – 89 – 90 – 91 – 92 – 93 – 94 – 95 – 96 – 97 – 98 – 99 – 100 – 101 – 102 – 103 – 104 – 105 – 106 – 107 – 108 – 109 – 110 – 111 – 112 – 113 – 114 – 115 – 116 – 117 – 118

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on August 23, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , Ezra, , , , , , ,   

    Ezra: The Post Mortem 

    Ezra: What was it all about?

    Here, once again, we have God forcing someone to do his bidding. If he can do that, why then is there so much trouble in the world?  I’m also a little confused as to why God needs so much gold and silver all the time.  What good is it to him?  Why all the counting of things?  As I asked in Ezra 2, does it make you more virtuous if you can count higher than others?  Why do we need to know how many camels somebody had?  All these things may have been necessary to fill out the book, but they mean nothing.  There were no morals actions taken or words spoken in Ezra.  Building God a house he doesn’t even live in isn’t moral.  It’s ridiculous.  Why would he want it?

    In Ezra 1 God wants his house built and causes it to get underway, but in Ezra 4 they stop and don’t start again till there was a new King.  What the hell?  Was God having a break and couldn’t keep them at it?  He doesn’t seem to be the all-powerful deity they try to make him out to be.

    Another point is that it was God’s fault that so many of his people were captured and taken away.  So then, why is it such a problem that they married people from the country they were taken to?  It could be looked on as God having sent them there.  If so, then what did he expect them to do?  Then to ask them to give up their spouses and any children born of them, just because they married ‘outside their people’ is freaking ridiculous.  If marrying anyone other than another Israelite is wrong, how do we end up with Polish Popes?  German Popes?  How can God allow this blasphemy?  These Popes are supposed to be God’s ‘man on earth’, his spokesperson. If you accept the word of the bible, this can’t be so.  He wouldn’t allow it.  Why doesn’t he strike these interlopers down?  Where is his much lauded wrath when it would do some good and show the people that he really existed?  As Yosemite Sam once said, “What a maroon!”

    << Ezra 10      Index      Nehemiah 1 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on August 22, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , , , Ezra, , , , , , , , , ,   

    Ezra 10: Piss off and take your kids with you!!! 

    Ezra Part 10 of 10

    1 Now while Ezra prayed and made confession, weeping and casting himself down before God’s house, there was gathered together to him out of Israel a very great assembly of men and women and children; for the people wept very bitterly.

    I think if my leader carried on in that manner I might cry too.  Then I’d get mad and boot him out.  What a drama queen.

    2 Shecaniah the son of Jehiel, one of the sons of Elam, answered Ezra, “We have trespassed against our God, and have married foreign women of the peoples of the land. Yet now there is hope for Israel concerning this thing.

    So God and the bible are against people marrying anyone from another country?

    3 Now therefore let us make a covenant with our God to put away all the wives, and such as are born of them, according to the counsel of my lord, and of those who tremble at the commandment of our God. Let it be done according to the law.

    Put away?  Hold on, let’s have this in plain english.  Does this mean kill them?  It certainly sounds like it.

    4 Arise; for the matter belongs to you, and we are with you. Be courageous, and do it.”

    5 Then Ezra arose, and made the chiefs of the priests, the Levites, and all Israel, to swear that they would do according to this word. So they swore.

    6 Then Ezra rose up from before God’s house, and went into the room of Jehohanan the son of Eliashib: and when he came there, he ate no bread, nor drank water; for he mourned because of their trespass of the captivity.

    7 They made proclamation throughout Judah and Jerusalem to all the children of the captivity, that they should gather themselves together to Jerusalem;

    Not looking good at all.

    8 and that whoever didn’t come within three days, according to the counsel of the princes and the elders, all his substance should be forfeited, and himself separated from the assembly of the captivity.

    9 Then all the men of Judah and Benjamin gathered themselves together to Jerusalem within the three days; it was the ninth month, on the twentieth day of the month: and all the people sat in the broad place before God’s house, trembling because of this matter, and for the great rain.

    I don’t care if it was the second tuesday of the second month in the year of the cane toad.  Get on with it.

    10 Ezra the priest stood up, and said to them, “You have trespassed, and have married foreign women, to increase the guilt of Israel.

    11 Now therefore make confession to Yahweh, the God of your fathers, and do his pleasure; and separate yourselves from the peoples of the land, and from the foreign women.”

    God would have them leave their wives and children?  Or will they be killed?

    12 Then all the assembly answered with a loud voice, “As you have said concerning us, so must we do.

    That’s bullshit.  There is no way a whole people would stand for such stupidity.  B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T!!!!

    13 But the people are many, and it is a time of much rain, and we are not able to stand outside; neither is this a work of one day or two; for we have greatly transgressed in this matter.

    14 Let now our princes be appointed for all the assembly, and let all those who are in our cities who have married foreign women come at appointed times, and with them the elders of every city, and its judges, until the fierce wrath of our God be turned from us, until this matter is resolved.”

    Come at appointed times?  For what?

    15 Only Jonathan the son of Asahel and Jahzeiah the son of Tikvah stood up against this; and Meshullam and Shabbethai the Levite helped them.

    Yay!  Someone with a brain.

    16 The children of the captivity did so. Ezra the priest, with certain heads of fathers’ households, after their fathers’ houses, and all of them by their names, were set apart; and they sat down in the first day of the tenth month to examine the matter.

    17 They made an end with all the men who had married foreign women by the first day of the first month.

    18 Among the sons of the priests there were found who had married foreign women: of the sons of Jeshua, the son of Jozadak, and his brothers, Maaseiah, and Eliezer, and Jarib, and Gedaliah.

    19 They gave their hand that they would put away their wives; and being guilty, they offered a ram of the flock for their guilt.

    We still haven’t heard what ‘put away’ means.

    20 Of the sons of Immer: Hanani and Zebadiah.

    21 Of the sons of Harim: Maaseiah, and Elijah, and Shemaiah, and Jehiel, and Uzziah.

    22 Of the sons of Pashhur: Elioenai, Maaseiah, Ishmael, Nethanel, Jozabad, and Elasah.

    23 Of the Levites: Jozabad, and Shimei, and Kelaiah (the same is Kelita), Pethahiah, Judah, and Eliezer.

    24 Of the singers: Eliashib. Of the porters: Shallum, and Telem, and Uri.

    25 Of Israel: Of the sons of Parosh: Ramiah, and Izziah, and Malchijah, and Mijamin, and Eleazar, and Malchijah, and Benaiah.

    26 Of the sons of Elam: Mattaniah, Zechariah, and Jehiel, and Abdi, and Jeremoth, and Elijah.

    27 Of the sons of Zattu: Elioenai, Eliashib, Mattaniah, and Jeremoth, and Zabad, and Aziza.

    28 Of the sons of Bebai: Jehohanan, Hananiah, Zabbai, Athlai.

    29 Of the sons of Bani: Meshullam, Malluch, and Adaiah, Jashub, and Sheal, Jeremoth.

    30 Of the sons of Pahathmoab: Adna, and Chelal, Benaiah, Maaseiah, Mattaniah, Bezalel, and Binnui, and Manasseh.

    31 Of the sons of Harim: Eliezer, Isshijah, Malchijah, Shemaiah, Shimeon,

    32 Benjamin, Malluch, Shemariah.

    33 Of the sons of Hashum: Mattenai, Mattattah, Zabad, Eliphelet, Jeremai, Manasseh, Shimei.

    34 Of the sons of Bani: Maadai, Amram, and Uel,

    35 Benaiah, Bedeiah, Cheluhi,

    36 Vaniah, Meremoth, Eliashib,

    37 Mattaniah, Mattenai, and Jaasu,

    38 and Bani, and Binnui, Shimei,

    39 and Shelemiah, and Nathan, and Adaiah,

    40 Machnadebai, Shashai, Sharai,

    41 Azarel, and Shelemiah, Shemariah,

    42 Shallum, Amariah, Joseph.

    43 Of the sons of Nebo: Jeiel, Mattithiah, Zabad, Zebina, Iddo, and Joel, Benaiah.

    44 All these had taken foreign wives; and some of them had wives by whom they had children.

    Ok, well, this is the final in the Book of Ezra, so I don’t know when we will hear what this is all about.  Maybe we won’t.

    << Ezra 9      Index      The Post Mortem >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on August 21, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , , , Ezra, , , , , , , , ,   

    Ezra 9: Step away from the children!!! 

    Ezra Part 9 of 10

    1 Now when these things were done, the princes drew near to me, saying, “The people of Israel, and the priests and the Levites, have not separated themselves from the peoples of the lands, following their abominations, even those of the Canaanites, the Hittites, the Perizzites, the Jebusites, the Ammonites, the Moabites, the Egyptians, and the Amorites.

    You didn’t expect everything to go the way you wanted it did you?  That isn’t the way the story was written.

    2 For they have taken of their daughters for themselves and for their sons, so that the holy seed have mixed themselves with the peoples of the lands. Yes, the hand of the princes and rulers has been chief in this trespass.”

    The took ‘their daughters for themselves’ and ‘for their sons’?  Incest rears it’s ugly head again.  I know, I know. They’ll say they meant the daughters of the Israelites, but that is NOT what it says.  This damn book should be taken at it’s word and not stuffed around with.  That leaves way too much open to interpretation by priests and look where that has gotten us.  If we took it to mean exactly what it says, then we’d have tossed the whole frigging lot in the bin centuries ago.

    3 When I heard this thing, I tore my garment and my robe, and plucked off the hair of my head and of my beard, and sat down confounded.

    As we still do.  Nearly.  At least the confounded bit.  :)

    4 Then were assembled to me everyone who trembled at the words of the God of Israel, because of their trespass of the captivity; and I sat confounded until the evening offering.

    5 At the evening offering I arose up from my humiliation, even with my garment and my robe torn; and I fell on my knees, and spread out my hands to Yahweh my God;

    6 and I said, “My God, I am ashamed and blush to lift up my face to you, my God; for our iniquities have increased over our head, and our guiltiness has grown up to the heavens.

    And it happened right under your nose.  But will you be punished or will everyone?

    7 Since the days of our fathers we have been exceeding guilty to this day; and for our iniquities we, our kings, and our priests, have been delivered into the hand of the kings of the lands, to the sword, to captivity, to plunder, and to confusion of face, as it is this day.

    So have the people.

    8 Now for a little moment grace has been shown from Yahweh our God, to leave us a remnant to escape, and to give us a nail in his holy place, that our God may lighten our eyes, and give us a little reviving in our bondage.

    A nail in his ‘holy place’?  Painful to say the least.

    9 For we are bondservants; yet our God has not forsaken us in our bondage, but has extended loving kindness to us in the sight of the kings of Persia, to give us a reviving, to set up the house of our God, and to repair its ruins, and to give us a wall in Judah and in Jerusalem.

    How do you think things got that way?  God let it happen.  He sent the other kings against you.  That is not loving-kindness!

    10 ”Now, our God, what shall we say after this? For we have forsaken your commandments,

    What shall you say?  Um, how about this?

    Our father who throws darts from heaven,
    you have a really strange name.

    We are but your sheeple,
    with whom you play this game.

    Give us this day,
    some women with really big hips.

    But please, oh please,
    don’t cut off our dicks. Amen.

    11 which you have commanded by your servants the prophets, saying, ‘The land, to which you go to possess it, is an unclean land through the uncleanness of the peoples of the lands, through their abominations, which have filled it from one end to another with their filthiness.

    Whose fault is that dude?  You allowed them to do these things.  You gave them the ability.  You didn’t stop them or try to teach them the error of their ways.  You just let them sin and now you are probably going to shit on them like you always do.

    12 Now therefore don’t give your daughters to their sons, neither take their daughters to your sons, nor seek their peace or their prosperity forever; that you may be strong, and eat the good of the land, and leave it for an inheritance to your children forever.’

    13 ”After all that has come on us for our evil deeds, and for our great guilt, since you, our God, have punished us less than our iniquities deserve, and have given us such a remnant,

    Freaking hell.  What a crawler.

    14 shall we again break your commandments, and join in affinity with the peoples that do these abominations? Wouldn’t you be angry with us until you had consumed us, so that there should be no remnant, nor any to escape?

    How can you be sure?  He hasn’t stopped you up till now.  How do you know he doesn’t want you to continue?

    15 Yahweh, the God of Israel, you are righteous; for we are left a remnant that has escaped, as it is this day. Behold, we are before you in our guiltiness; for none can stand before you because of this.”

    Then don’t stand before him.  Turn around.  Show him your backs and live you lives the way you know you should.  Just as people have been doing all along with his help or lack of it.

    << Ezra 8      Index      Ezra 10>>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on August 20, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , , Ezra, , , , , , , , , ,   

    Ezra 8: Warning Will Robinson, Warning. Genealogy to follow. 

    Ezra Part 8 of 10

    And here it is…

    1 Now these are the heads of their fathers’ households, and this is the genealogy of those who went up with me from Babylon, in the reign of Artaxerxes the king:

    2 Of the sons of Phinehas, Gershom. Of the sons of Ithamar, Daniel. Of the sons of David, Hattush.

    3 Of the sons of Shecaniah, of the sons of Parosh, Zechariah; and with him were reckoned by genealogy of the males one hundred fifty.

    4 Of the sons of Pahathmoab, Eliehoenai the son of Zerahiah; and with him two hundred males.

    5 Of the sons of Shecaniah, the son of Jahaziel; and with him three hundred males.

    6 Of the sons of Adin, Ebed the son of Jonathan; and with him fifty males.

    7 Of the sons of Elam, Jeshaiah the son of Athaliah; and with him seventy males.

    8 Of the sons of Shephatiah, Zebadiah the son of Michael; and with him eighty males.

    9 Of the sons of Joab, Obadiah the son of Jehiel; and with him two hundred and eighteen males.

    10 Of the sons of Shelomith, the son of Josiphiah; and with him one hundred sixty males.

    11 Of the sons of Bebai, Zechariah the son of Bebai; and with him twenty-eight males.

    12 Of the sons of Azgad, Johanan the son of Hakkatan; and with him one hundred ten males.

    13 Of the sons of Adonikam, who were the last; and these are their names: Eliphelet, Jeuel, and Shemaiah; and with them sixty males.

    14 Of the sons of Bigvai, Uthai and Zabbud; and with them seventy males.

    Ok, ok, you have lots of sons to fight, rape, pillage, party, build, kill animals, sprinkle blood or just plain scratch themselves silly.  So freaking what?

    15 I gathered them together to the river that runs to Ahava; and there we encamped three days: and I viewed the people, and the priests, and found there none of the sons of Levi.

    Slackers!

    16 Then sent I for Eliezer, for Ariel, for Shemaiah, and for Elnathan, and for Jarib, and for Elnathan, and for Nathan, and for Zechariah, and for Meshullam, chief men; also for Joiarib, and for Elnathan, who were teachers.

    17 I sent them forth to Iddo the chief at the place Casiphia; and I told them what they should tell Iddo, and his brothers the Nethinim, at the place Casiphia, that they should bring to us ministers for the house of our God.

    18 According to the good hand of our God on us they brought us a man of discretion, of the sons of Mahli, the son of Levi, the son of Israel; and Sherebiah, with his sons and his brothers, eighteen;

    Well, at least a few people will get a pair of Levi’s.  :)

    19 and Hashabiah, and with him Jeshaiah of the sons of Merari, his brothers and their sons, twenty;

    20 and of the Nethinim, whom David and the princes had given for the service of the Levites, two hundred and twenty Nethinim: all of them were mentioned by name.

    21 Then I proclaimed a fast there, at the river Ahava, that we might humble ourselves before our God, to seek of him a straight way for us, and for our little ones, and for all our substance.

    Too hard to figure out for yourselves?  Be good people.  Don’t hurt others.  Help people who need it.  These are all easy things to understand for yourselves.  You don’t need a bossy old goat in the sky to tell you this stuff.

    22 For I was ashamed to ask of the king a band of soldiers and horsemen to help us against the enemy on the way, because we had spoken to the king, saying, “The hand of our God is on all those who seek him, for good; but his power and his wrath is against all those who forsake him.”

    And he’ll shit on those who seek him when he’s in the mood as well.  Read the damn bible and you’ll see just how fickle he can be. Even to those who are stupid enough to follow him.

    23 So we fasted and begged our God for this: and he was entreated of us.

    What god worth more than a bag of camel dung would want his people to starve themselves?  Think about it.

    24 Then I set apart twelve of the chiefs of the priests, even Sherebiah, Hashabiah, and ten of their brothers with them,

    25 and weighed to them the silver, and the gold, and the vessels, even the offering for the house of our God, which the king, and his counselors, and his princes, and all Israel there present, had offered:

    26 I weighed into their hand six hundred fifty talents of silver, and silver vessels one hundred talents; of gold one hundred talents;

    27 and twenty bowls of gold, of one thousand darics; and two vessels of fine bright brass, precious as gold.

    28 I said to them, “You are holy to Yahweh, and the vessels are holy; and the silver and the gold are a freewill offering to Yahweh, the God of your fathers.

    God is supposed to be a ‘god’!!!  What use has he for such trinkets?

    29 Watch, and keep them, until you weigh them before the chiefs of the priests and the Levites, and the princes of the fathers’ households of Israel, at Jerusalem, in the rooms of the house of Yahweh.”

    30 So the priests and the Levites received the weight of the silver and the gold, and the vessels, to bring them to Jerusalem to the house of our God.

    And did God take any of it up to his heavenly abode?  Did any of it disappear?  Or did it just sit there?

    31 Then we departed from the river Ahava on the twelfth day of the first month, to go to Jerusalem: and the hand of our God was on us, and he delivered us from the hand of the enemy and the bandit by the way.

    Who says they were after you in the first place?

    32 We came to Jerusalem, and stayed there three days.

    33 On the fourth day the silver and the gold and the vessels were weighed in the house of our God into the hand of Meremoth the son of Uriah the priest; and with him was Eleazar the son of Phinehas; and with them was Jozabad the son of Jeshua, and Noadiah the son of Binnui, the Levite;

    34 the whole by number and by weight: and all the weight was written at that time.

    35 The children of the captivity, who had come out of exile, offered burnt offerings to the God of Israel, twelve bulls for all Israel, ninety-six rams, seventy-seven lambs, and twelve male goats for a sin offering: all this was a burnt offering to Yahweh.

    Yeah and he sniffed and he huffed and he fell down laughing himself silly at the people below because they were such morons!

    36 They delivered the king’s commissions to the king’s satraps, and to the governors beyond the River: and they furthered the people and God’s house.

    While the priests sat back, got richer, fatter and also laughed themselves silly at the gullibility of the people. As they do to this day.

    << Ezra 7      Index      Ezra 9>>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on August 19, 2011 Permalink
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    Ezra 7: Priests and Prophets? More like Thieves and Thugs! 

    Ezra Part 7 of 10

    1 Now after these things, in the reign of Artaxerxes king of Persia, Ezra the son of Seraiah, the son of Azariah, the son of Hilkiah,

    2 the son of Shallum, the son of Zadok, the son of Ahitub,

    3 the son of Amariah, the son of Azariah, the son of Meraioth,

    4 the son of Zerahiah, the son of Uzzi, the son of Bukki,

    5 the son of Abishua, the son of Phinehas, the son of Eleazar, the son of Aaron the chief priest;

    6 this Ezra went up from Babylon: and he was a ready scribe in the law of Moses, which Yahweh, the God of Israel, had given; and the king granted him all his request, according to the hand of Yahweh his God on him.

    What has his genealogy got to do with anything?  Does knowing who your ancestors were make you a better person?

    7 There went up some of the children of Israel, and of the priests, and the Levites, and the singers, and the porters, and the Nethinim, to Jerusalem, in the seventh year of Artaxerxes the king.

    8 He came to Jerusalem in the fifth month, which was in the seventh year of the king.

    Does knowing when this happened make it a better event?  Is it more moral for knowing?

    9 For on the first day of the first month began he to go up from Babylon; and on the first day of the fifth month came he to Jerusalem, according to the good hand of his God on him.

    10 For Ezra had set his heart to seek the law of Yahweh, and to do it, and to teach in Israel statutes and ordinances.

    11 Now this is the copy of the letter that the king Artaxerxes gave to Ezra the priest, the scribe, even the scribe of the words of the commandments of Yahweh, and of his statutes to Israel:

    It’s only words from one human to another human.  If god is so damn great, why don’t we actually have words from him, on paper, in his hand, giving his instructions instead of the rubbish we have in the bible? Sacrifices and murder is all we ever seem to get. Unless you want to count incest, rape, torture and inhumane treatment of animals as well.

    12 Artaxerxes, king of kings, to Ezra the priest, the scribe of the law of the God of heaven, perfect and so forth.

    13 I make a decree, that all those of the people of Israel, and their priests and the Levites, in my realm, who are minded of their own free will to go to Jerusalem, go with you.

    Everyone is just going to traipse all the way to Jerusalem?

    14 Because you are sent of the king and his seven counselors, to inquire concerning Judah and Jerusalem, according to the law of your God which is in your hand,

    15 and to carry the silver and gold, which the king and his counselors have freely offered to the God of Israel, whose habitation is in Jerusalem,

    Why?  Why send all this gold and silver?  What is God going to do with it?

    16 and all the silver and gold that you shall find in all the province of Babylon, with the freewill offering of the people, and of the priests, offering willingly for the house of their God which is in Jerusalem;

    What will happen to it?  Will it just sit there doing nothing?  Not being of any use to anyone?  Are you just going to take everyone’s belongings if it is made of gold or silver?  More theft in the name of Gawd AllFreakingMighty?

    17 therefore you shall with all diligence buy with this money bulls, rams, lambs, with their meal offerings and their drink offerings, and shall offer them on the altar of the house of your God which is in Jerusalem.

    You’re going to take the people’s gold and silver and then use it to buy their livestock off them?  Why not just take the livestock on the first place and stop stuffing around?

    18 Whatever shall seem good to you and to your brothers to do with the rest of the silver and the gold, do that after the will of your God.

    Yeah, right!  There’s an open invitation for the priests to take whatever they like for themselves.  No wonder they all seem to have this sense of entitlement.

    19 The vessels that are given to you for the service of the house of your God, deliver before the God of Jerusalem.

    20 Whatever more shall be needful for the house of your God, which you shall have occasion to bestow, bestow it out of the king’s treasure house.

    All of which came from the people.

    21 I, even I Artaxerxes the king, do make a decree to all the treasurers who are beyond the River, that whatever Ezra the priest, the scribe of the law of the God of heaven, shall require of you, it be done with all diligence,

    22 to one hundred talents of silver, and to one hundred measures of wheat, and to one hundred baths of wine, and to one hundred baths of oil, and salt without prescribing how much.

    He’s putting a limit on it?

    23 Whatever is commanded by the God of heaven, let it be done exactly for the house of the God of heaven; for why should there be wrath against the realm of the king and his sons?

    So you’re paying to stop God’s wrath!  That is a protection racket!!!

    24 Also we inform you, that touching any of the priests and Levites, the singers, porters, Nethinim, or servants of this house of God, it shall not be lawful to impose tribute, custom, or toll, on them.

    Another reason they think they are entitled.

    25 You, Ezra, after the wisdom of your God who is in your hand, appoint magistrates and judges, who may judge all the people who are beyond the River, all such as know the laws of your God; and teach him who doesn’t know them.

    No freedom of religion here.

    26 Whoever will not do the law of your God, and the law of the king, let judgment be executed on him with all diligence, whether it be to death, or to banishment, or to confiscation of goods, or to imprisonment.

    That’s very nice isn’t it.  Love me or die!  Morons.

    27 Blessed be Yahweh, the God of our fathers, who has put such a thing as this in the king’s heart, to beautify the house of Yahweh which is in Jerusalem;

    How is it beautiful to threaten your people with death if they don’t kiss Gawd’s arse?

    28 and has extended loving kindness to me before the king, and his counselors, and before all the king’s mighty princes. I was strengthened according to the hand of Yahweh my God on me, and I gathered together out of Israel chief men to go up with me.

    Loving kindness to you?  What about the people?  They either live under your thumb, giving up everything so you can ‘sacrifice’ it to God, while you live it up in luxury at their expense.

    << Ezra 6      Index      Ezra 8>>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on August 18, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , , Ezra, , , , , , , , ,   

    Ezra 6: Hey sheeples, kiss my deified arse!!! 

    Ezra Part 6 of 10

    1 Then Darius the king made a decree, and search was made in the house of the archives, where the treasures were laid up in Babylon.

    2 There was found at Achmetha, in the palace that is in the province of Media, a scroll, and therein was thus written for a record:

    I just watched an old episode of ‘Fractured Fairy Tales’ and that had more meaning that this tripe.

    3 In the first year of Cyrus the king, Cyrus the king made a decree: Concerning God’s house at Jerusalem, let the house be built, the place where they offer sacrifices, and let its foundations be strongly laid; its height sixty cubits, and its breadth sixty cubits;

    Don’t let it be built / Let it be built.  Make up your minds.

    4 with three courses of great stones, and a course of new timber: and let the expenses be given out of the king’s house.

    Yeah, but where does that money come from in the first place?  Hmmmm?

    5 Also let the gold and silver vessels of God’s house, which Nebuchadnezzar took forth out of the temple which is at Jerusalem, and brought to Babylon, be restored, and brought again to the temple which is at Jerusalem, everyone to its place; and you shall put them in God’s house.

    Because the big guy needs something to drink out of you know.

    6 Now therefore, Tattenai, governor beyond the River, Shetharbozenai, and your companions the Apharsachites, who are beyond the River, you must stay far from there.

    From where?  The river or God’s House?

    7 Leave the work of this house of God alone; let the governor of the Jews and the elders of the Jews build this house of God in its place.

    God’s House.  Ok, but why?

    8 Moreover I make a decree what you shall do to these elders of the Jews for the building of this house of God: that of the king’s goods, even of the tribute beyond the River, expenses be given with all diligence to these men, that they be not hindered.

    Pay them even more?  Again, why?

    9 That which they have need of, both young bulls, and rams, and lambs, for burnt offerings to the God of heaven; also wheat, salt, wine, and oil, according to the word of the priests who are at Jerusalem, let it be given them day by day without fail;

    10 that they may offer sacrifices of pleasant aroma to the God of heaven, and pray for the life of the king, and of his sons.

    What makes people think that God wants to sniff smelly burning animal flesh?

    11 Also I have made a decree, that whoever shall alter this word, let a beam be pulled out from his house, and let him be lifted up and fastened thereon; and let his house be made a dunghill for this:

    Nasty!

    12 and the God who has caused his name to dwell there overthrow all kings and peoples who shall put forth their hand to alter the same, to destroy this house of God which is at Jerusalem. I Darius have made a decree; let it be done with all diligence.

    Why does it need this Darius or any other bighead to order this?  If God wanted it, it would just happen.

    13 Then Tattenai, the governor beyond the River, Shetharbozenai, and their companions, because Darius the king had sent a decree, did accordingly with all diligence.

    Give them a gold star each.

    14 The elders of the Jews built and prospered, through the prophesying of Haggai the prophet and Zechariah the son of Iddo. They built and finished it, according to the commandment of the God of Israel, and according to the decree of Cyrus, and Darius, and Artaxerxes king of Persia.

    How did Persia end up Islamic instead of Christian then?  God not that powerful?

    15 This house was finished on the third day of the month Adar, which was in the sixth year of the reign of Darius the king.

    Did you have a house warming for him?  What do you give a god for a house warming other than stinky burning animal flesh?

    16 The children of Israel, the priests, and the Levites, and the rest of the children of the captivity, kept the dedication of this house of God with joy.

    17 They offered at the dedication of this house of God one hundred bulls, two hundred rams, four hundred lambs; and for a sin offering for all Israel, twelve male goats, according to the number of the tribes of Israel.

    18 They set the priests in their divisions, and the Levites in their courses, for the service of God, which is at Jerusalem; as it is written in the book of Moses.

    19 The children of the captivity kept the Passover on the fourteenth day of the first month.

    20 For the priests and the Levites had purified themselves together; all of them were pure: and they killed the Passover for all the children of the captivity, and for their brothers the priests, and for themselves.

    And they sprinkled blood all over themselves like the morons that they were and danced around like fools.

    21 The children of Israel who had come again out of the captivity, and all such as had separated themselves to them from the filthiness of the nations of the land, to seek Yahweh, the God of Israel, ate,

    22 and kept the feast of unleavened bread seven days with joy: for Yahweh had made them joyful, and had turned the heart of the king of Assyria to them, to strengthen their hands in the work of God’s house, the God of Israel.

    So we are back to the same old place yet again.  God can, but usually won’t.  When he does everyone has to kiss his filthy arse until something goes wrong and then he shits all over them again.  So turns the world of the delusional moron.

    << Ezra 5      Index      Ezra 7>>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on August 17, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , Ezra, , , , , , ,   

    Ezra 5: Wake me when something good happens will you? 

    Ezra Part 5 of 10

    1 Now the prophets, Haggai the prophet, and Zechariah the son of Iddo, prophesied to the Jews who were in Judah and Jerusalem; in the name of the God of Israel they prophesied to them.

    I wonder if they used Tarot Cards?

    2 Then rose up Zerubbabel the son of Shealtiel, and Jeshua the son of Jozadak, and began to build God’s house which is at Jerusalem; and with them were the prophets of God, helping them.

    So it’s still going to be built.

    3 At the same time came to them Tattenai, the governor beyond the River, and Shetharbozenai, and their companions, and said thus to them, “Who gave you a decree to build this house, and to finish this wall?”

    4 Then we told them in this way, what the names of the men were who were making this building.

    5 But the eye of their God was on the elders of the Jews, and they did not make them cease, until the matter should come to Darius, and then answer should be returned by letter concerning it.

    That wouldn’t be very quick either.  The post over there would have been pretty bad compared to today.

    6 The copy of the letter that Tattenai, the governor beyond the River, and Shetharbozenai, and his companions the Apharsachites, who were beyond the River, sent to Darius the king;

    7 they sent a letter to him, in which was written thus: To Darius the king, all peace.

    Darius Oh Darius, you really don’t Scary Us…

    8 Be it known to the king, that we went into the province of Judah, to the house of the great God, which is built with great stones, and timber is laid in the walls; and this work goes on with diligence and prospers in their hands.

    9 Then we asked those elders, and said to them thus, “Who gave you a decree to build this house, and to finish this wall?”

    “They asked for our ID, but we’d left them in our other pants.”

    10 We asked them their names also, to inform you that we might write the names of the men who were at their head.

    11 Thus they returned us answer, saying, “We are the servants of the God of heaven and earth, and are building the house that was built these many years ago, which a great king of Israel built and finished.

    This is the house that Jack built.

    This is the malt
    That lay in the house that Jack built.

    This is the rat,
    That ate the malt
    That lay in the house that Jack built. etc

    For the rest go here. Ok, ok, I’m bored already.

    12 But after that our fathers had provoked the God of heaven to wrath, he gave them into the hand of Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon, the Chaldean, who destroyed this house, and carried the people away into Babylon.

    13 But in the first year of Cyrus king of Babylon, Cyrus the king made a decree to build this house of God.

    14 The gold and silver vessels also of God’s house, which Nebuchadnezzar took out of the temple that was in Jerusalem, and brought into the temple of Babylon, those Cyrus the king took out of the temple of Babylon, and they were delivered to one whose name was Sheshbazzar, whom he had made governor;

    Waffle!  Nothing but waffle.  Where are the stories to base your life upon?  Where are the morals?  Something positive for a change would be nice.

    15 and he said to him, ‘Take these vessels, go, put them in the temple that is in Jerusalem, and let God’s house be built in its place.’

    16 Then the same Sheshbazzar came, and laid the foundations of God’s house which is in Jerusalem: and since that time even until now has it been in building, and yet it is not completed.

    17 Now therefore, if it seem good to the king, let a search be made in the king’s treasure house, which is there at Babylon, whether it be so, that a decree was made of Cyrus the king to build this house of God at Jerusalem; and let the king send his pleasure to us concerning this matter.”

    Wake me when something good happens will you?

    << Ezra 4      Index      Ezra 6>>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on August 16, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , Ezra, , , , , , , ,   

    Ezra 4: Stop! Or we’ll huff and we’ll puff and blow your god’s house down! 

    Ezra Part 4 of 10

    1 Now when the adversaries of Judah and Benjamin heard that the children of the captivity were building a temple to Yahweh, the God of Israel;

    They laughed and they laaaaauuuuuggggghhhhheeeeeddddd!!!!  Just like I did.

    2 then they drew near to Zerubbabel, and to the heads of fathers’ households, and said to them, “Let us build with you; for we seek your God, as you do; and we sacrifice to him since the days of Esar Haddon king of Assyria, who brought us up here.”

    They sacrificed three virgins and a partridge in a pear tree.  Or was that just a dream I had?

    3 But Zerubbabel, and Jeshua, and the rest of the heads of fathers’ households of Israel, said to them, “You have nothing to do with us in building a house to our God; but we ourselves together will build to Yahweh, the God of Israel, as king Cyrus the king of Persia has commanded us.”

    Yeah, this is our Clubhouse.  You go build your own dude!!!

    4 Then the people of the land weakened the hands of the people of Judah, and troubled them in building,

    Can’t these guys ever get along?  Will there ever be peace in this part of the world?  It seems not.

    5 and hired counselors against them, to frustrate their purpose, all the days of Cyrus king of Persia, even until the reign of Darius king of Persia.

    6 In the reign of Ahasuerus, in the beginning of his reign, wrote they an accusation against the inhabitants of Judah and Jerusalem.

    Sticks and stones dude, sticks and stones.

    7 In the days of Artaxerxes wrote Bishlam, Mithredath, Tabeel, and the rest of his companions, to Artaxerxes king of Persia; and the writing of the letter was written in Syrian, and set forth in the Syrian language.

    The language it was written in makes a difference how?

    8 Rehum the chancellor and Shimshai the scribe wrote a letter against Jerusalem to Artaxerxes the king in this sort:

    9 then Rehum the chancellor, and Shimshai the scribe, and the rest of their companions, the Dinaites, and the Apharsathchites, the Tarpelites, the Apharsites, the Archevites, the Babylonians, the Shushanchites, the Dehaites, the Elamites,

    10 and the rest of the nations whom the great and noble Osnappar brought over, and set in the city of Samaria, and in the rest of the country beyond the River, and so forth, wrote.

    11 This is the copy of the letter that they sent to Artaxerxes the king: Your servants the men beyond the River, and so forth.

    12 Be it known to the king, that the Jews who came up from you have come to us to Jerusalem; they are building the rebellious and the bad city, and have finished the walls, and repaired the foundations.

    13 Be it known now to the king that if this city is built, and the walls finished, they will not pay tribute, custom, or toll, and in the end it will be hurtful to the kings.

    But is this true?  Or is it just propaganda?

    14 Now because we eat the salt of the palace, and it is not appropriate for us to see the king’s dishonor, therefore have we sent and informed the king;

    15 that search may be made in the book of the records of your fathers: so you shall find in the book of the records, and know that this city is a rebellious city, and hurtful to kings and provinces, and that they have moved sedition within the same of old time; for which cause was this city laid waste.

    16 We inform the king that, if this city be built, and the walls finished, by this means you shall have no portion beyond the River.

    A city is just a city.  The people may be bad, but not the city.  So what is the problem with the city being built?

    17 Then the king sent an answer to Rehum the chancellor, and to Shimshai the scribe, and to the rest of their companions who dwell in Samaria, and in the rest of the country beyond the River: Peace, and so forth.

    18 The letter which you sent to us has been plainly read before me.

    19 I decreed, and search has been made, and it is found that this city of old time has made insurrection against kings, and that rebellion and sedition have been made therein.

    That does not mean the people will do that now though.  Then again, with the way everyone has been carrying on so far in this idiotic book, nothing would surprise me.

    20 There have been mighty kings also over Jerusalem, who have ruled over all the country beyond the River; and tribute, custom, and toll, was paid to them.

    21 Make a decree now to cause these men to cease, and that this city not be built, until a decree shall be made by me.

    22 Take heed that you not be slack herein: why should damage grow to the hurt of the kings?

    23 Then when the copy of king Artaxerxes’ letter was read before Rehum, and Shimshai the scribe, and their companions, they went in haste to Jerusalem to the Jews, and made them to cease by force and power.

    24 Then ceased the work of God’s house which is at Jerusalem; and it ceased until the second year of the reign of Darius king of Persia.

    So the Jews of Jerusalem weren’t allowed to build a House of God?  It still doesn’t make any sense.

    << Ezra 3      Index      Ezra 5>>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on August 15, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , Ezra, , , , , , ,   

    Ezra 3: Stupid is as stupid does. 

    Ezra Part 3 of 10

    1 When the seventh month had come, and the children of Israel were in the cities, the people gathered themselves together as one man to Jerusalem.

    2 Then Jeshua the son of Jozadak stood up with his brothers the priests, and Zerubbabel the son of Shealtiel and his brothers, and built the altar of the God of Israel, to offer burnt offerings thereon, as it is written in the law of Moses the man of God.

    I don’t care if it’s written on the side of a mountain in 50 cubit high gold characters.  Stupid is still stupid.

    3 In spite of their fear because of the peoples of the surrounding lands, they set the altar on its base; and they offered burnt offerings on it to Yahweh, even burnt offerings morning and evening.

    The altar would make a good burnt offering itself.

    4 They kept the feast of tents, as it is written, and offered the daily burnt offerings by number, according to the ordinance, as the duty of every day required;

    It doesn’t matter.  It may as well be devil worship for all the good it does.  So far there has been absolutely no moral base shown whatsoever for all this idiotic carrying on.

    5 and afterward the continual burnt offering, the offerings of the new moons, of all the set feasts of Yahweh that were consecrated, and of everyone who willingly offered a freewill offering to Yahweh.

    Freewill?  When they are scared to death that God will hit them with another plague or send the Syrians against them?  That isn’t freewill.

    6 From the first day of the seventh month, they began to offer burnt offerings to Yahweh; but the foundation of Yahweh’s temple was not yet laid.

    7 They also gave money to the masons, and to the carpenters. They also gave food, drink, and oil to the people of Sidon and Tyre, to bring cedar trees from Lebanon to the sea, to Joppa, according to the grant that they had from Cyrus King of Persia.

    8 Now in the second year of their coming to God’s house at Jerusalem, in the second month, Zerubbabel the son of Shealtiel, and Jeshua the son of Jozadak, and the rest of their brothers the priests and the Levites, and all those who had come out of the captivity to Jerusalem, began the work and appointed the Levites, from twenty years old and upward, to have the oversight of the work of Yahweh’s house.

    9 Then Jeshua stood with his sons and his brothers, Kadmiel and his sons, the sons of Judah, together, to have the oversight of the workmen in God’s house: the sons of Henadad, with their sons and their brothers the Levites.

    10 When the builders laid the foundation of Yahweh’s temple, they set the priests in their clothing with trumpets, with the Levites the sons of Asaph with cymbals, to praise Yahweh, according to the directions of David king of Israel.

    11 They sang to one another in praising and giving thanks to Yahweh, “For he is good, for his loving kindness endures forever toward Israel.” All the people shouted with a great shout, when they praised Yahweh, because the foundation of the house of Yahweh had been laid.

    Hahahahahahaha!!!  Loving kindness?  Give me a break.  God has caused more problems for you than you have caused for yourselves.

    12 But many of the priests and Levites and heads of fathers’ households, the old men who had seen the first house, when the foundation of this house was laid before their eyes, wept with a loud voice. Many also shouted aloud for joy,

    13 so that the people could not discern the noise of the shout of joy from the noise of the weeping of the people; for the people shouted with a loud shout, and the noise was heard far away.

    Was it as loud as the screams of the people tortured to death by priests?  Was it as loud as the screams and crying from the children abused by the priests?

    << Ezra 2      Index      Ezra 4>>

     

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