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  • DistroMan 20:00 on December 11, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , Family, , , , , , , , , ,   

    Psalm 38: Welfare of others before wealth for yourself. 

    Psalms Part 38 of 150

    A Psalm by David, for a memorial.

    1 Yahweh, don’t rebuke me in your wrath,

    neither chasten me in your hot displeasure.

    As usual, it’s about what David wants.

    2 For your arrows have pierced me,

    your hand presses hard on me.

    3 There is no soundness in my flesh because of your indignation,

    neither is there any health in my bones because of my sin.

    Again admitting you have erred and been punished.  How long before you state how perfect you have been?

    4 For my iniquities have gone over my head.

    As a heavy burden, they are too heavy for me.

    5 My wounds are loathsome and corrupt,

    because of my foolishness.

    Then why aren’t you dead?  Isn’t that what you’ve said many times that God does to sinners?

    6 I am pained and bowed down greatly.

    I go mourning all day long.

    Whining is the word you should use.

    7 For my waist is filled with burning.

    There is no soundness in my flesh.

    8 I am faint and severely bruised.

    I have groaned by reason of the anguish of my heart.

    9 Lord, all my desire is before you.

    My groaning is not hidden from you.

    10 My heart throbs.

    My strength fails me.

    As for the light of my eyes, it has also left me.

    11 My lovers and my friends stand aloof from my plague.

    My kinsmen stand far away.

    Maybe if you stopped whining all day long they might feel you a worthy person to be around.  As it is, you’re a real bummer.

    12 They also who seek after my life lay snares.

    Those who seek my hurt speak mischievous things,

    and meditate deceits all day long.

    13 But I, as a deaf man, don’t hear.

    I am as a mute man who doesn’t open his mouth.

    14 Yes, I am as a man who doesn’t hear,

    in whose mouth are no reproofs.

    15 For in you, Yahweh, do I hope.

    You will answer, Lord my God.

    Maybe as King you should just do good deeds for your people.  Rule over them in a compassionate way.  Be a father to them, not a cruel dictator like Jehovah!

    16 For I said, “Don’t let them gloat over me,

    or exalt themselves over me when my foot slips.”

    17 For I am ready to fall.

    My pain is continually before me.

    18 For I will declare my iniquity.

    I will be sorry for my sin.

    19 But my enemies are vigorous and many.

    Those who hate me without reason are numerous.

    I doubt it’s without reason.  Most will have very good reason to hate you.  You haven’t exactly looked after your people.  How many fathers have died while out serving in your army?  How many brothers have died at the hands of your enemies?  How many children are now fatherless and have nobody to provide for them because you want to use your religion to expand your holding?

    20 They who also render evil for good are adversaries to me,

    because I follow what is good.

    No, you follow what is good for you.  That is very different to following what is good.

    21 Don’t forsake me, Yahweh.

    My God, don’t be far from me.

    22 Hurry to help me,

    Lord, my salvation.

    Still it’s just about you.  When do we hear words coming from your mouth in quest of something for those you have harmed?  How about looking after their welfare instead of your own?

    << Psalm 37      Index      Psalm 39 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on December 3, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , , , Family, immunisation, , , , , ,   

    When stupidity crosses the line and becomes life threatening. 

    No vaccine has ever undergone a true double-blind crossover placebo study.

    I recently read these words and thought that they couldn’t be true.  How could drugs not be tested properly?  But you see, I am not well versed in the ways of drug/vaccine testing at all.  What should one do in these circumstances?  Research.  It’s not hard these days with the internet and search engines.

    First, I know what a vaccine is.  I’ve had them myself.  So have my children and my grandchildren.  We’re all fine.  What I didn’t know was what a ‘double blind crossover placebo study’ actually meant.  Yes, I get double blind and placebo.  What I didn’t get was ‘crossover’.   From what I gather, if you had 100 people, split into two groups of 50 people each and gave one half the drug and the other half the placebo without anyone knowing what they were getting, you’d have a double blind placebo trial.  The ‘crossover’ means that halfway through the trial you would change them over so that the people getting the drug would now be getting the placebo and the others that were getting the placebo would now be getting the drug.  Neither group would know a change had taken place.

    That sounds all well and good on the surface, but we’re talking about vaccines here.  You can’t do a crossover when the effects of the drug/vaccine don’t just go away when you stop taking them.  Vaccines have long term effects.    They don’t lend themselves to this kind of test.  It just can’t be done.

    So, why would someone purposely make the statement that ‘No vaccine has ever undergone a true double-blind crossover placebo study’?  Well, for a start they are obviously anti vaccine.  Secondly, they seem to have enough of an understanding of vaccines and trials to be dangerous, but not enough to be able to educate themselves or others.

    When people put themselves out there as some kind of authority on a subject with health implications, they should at least have some kind of qualifications to back up their advice.  I have been married to and looked after a Type 1 Diabetic for 32 years now and would never pretend to be able to give advice to others with diabetes.  What is it that makes some people put themselves above properly trained and experienced medical practitioners?  Where do they get the idea that they have the right to make life and death decisions about other peoples children?

    I understand the right to free speech, but not at the cost to our children’s welfare.  When people can’t be bothered to learn the facts about a topic they purport to be an authority on they should shut their mouths.  There is no nice way to put this.  They are endangering lives.  If only one child is harmed due to the ignorance, arrogance and downright stupidity of these people then they should be held accountable.  The problem is that it isn’t only their own children now.  They are convincing other parents to do the same thing and not vaccinate their children as well.  I keep hearing about parents rights to choose for their children, but that isn’t the complete story.  If one child isn’t vaccinated they can then become infected and carry that disease to other children too young to be immunised.

    From Wikipedia: “Herd immunity (or community immunity) describes a form of immunity that occurs when the vaccination of a significant portion of a population (or herd) provides a measure of protection for individuals who have not developed immunity. Herd immunity theory proposes that, in contagious diseases that are transmitted from individual to individual, chains of infection are likely to be disrupted when large numbers of a population are immune or less susceptible to the disease. The greater the proportion of individuals who are resistant, the smaller the probability that a susceptible individual will come into contact with an infectious individual.”

    When these people do not immunise their children they directly affect the ability of the herd immunity to do it’s job.  In turn they lessen our ability to protect our children.

    So, when ignorant, uneducated (at least on the vaccine/immunisation topic) morons open their mouths and convince other people to believe their nonsense, it is putting lives at risk.  We don’t let people stand in the middle of the road giving directions to car drivers that would endanger their lives.  We don’t let people wander into schools and take the place of teachers.  We don’t let people wander into hospitals and start dispensing medical advice.

    I’m not just talking about one parent talking to another parent here.  I’m talking about people that set up legal, state sanctioned, incorporated entities.  They use this to convince people they know what they are talking about when they don’t.  They use this to help raise funds to promote their lunacy even further.

    Why are we letting these dangerous fools get away with what is nothing less than attempted manslaughter and what one day soon may actually cause a death?

    SHUT THEM DOWN!

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on August 22, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , Family, , , , , , , ,   

    Ezra 10: Piss off and take your kids with you!!! 

    Ezra Part 10 of 10

    1 Now while Ezra prayed and made confession, weeping and casting himself down before God’s house, there was gathered together to him out of Israel a very great assembly of men and women and children; for the people wept very bitterly.

    I think if my leader carried on in that manner I might cry too.  Then I’d get mad and boot him out.  What a drama queen.

    2 Shecaniah the son of Jehiel, one of the sons of Elam, answered Ezra, “We have trespassed against our God, and have married foreign women of the peoples of the land. Yet now there is hope for Israel concerning this thing.

    So God and the bible are against people marrying anyone from another country?

    3 Now therefore let us make a covenant with our God to put away all the wives, and such as are born of them, according to the counsel of my lord, and of those who tremble at the commandment of our God. Let it be done according to the law.

    Put away?  Hold on, let’s have this in plain english.  Does this mean kill them?  It certainly sounds like it.

    4 Arise; for the matter belongs to you, and we are with you. Be courageous, and do it.”

    5 Then Ezra arose, and made the chiefs of the priests, the Levites, and all Israel, to swear that they would do according to this word. So they swore.

    6 Then Ezra rose up from before God’s house, and went into the room of Jehohanan the son of Eliashib: and when he came there, he ate no bread, nor drank water; for he mourned because of their trespass of the captivity.

    7 They made proclamation throughout Judah and Jerusalem to all the children of the captivity, that they should gather themselves together to Jerusalem;

    Not looking good at all.

    8 and that whoever didn’t come within three days, according to the counsel of the princes and the elders, all his substance should be forfeited, and himself separated from the assembly of the captivity.

    9 Then all the men of Judah and Benjamin gathered themselves together to Jerusalem within the three days; it was the ninth month, on the twentieth day of the month: and all the people sat in the broad place before God’s house, trembling because of this matter, and for the great rain.

    I don’t care if it was the second tuesday of the second month in the year of the cane toad.  Get on with it.

    10 Ezra the priest stood up, and said to them, “You have trespassed, and have married foreign women, to increase the guilt of Israel.

    11 Now therefore make confession to Yahweh, the God of your fathers, and do his pleasure; and separate yourselves from the peoples of the land, and from the foreign women.”

    God would have them leave their wives and children?  Or will they be killed?

    12 Then all the assembly answered with a loud voice, “As you have said concerning us, so must we do.

    That’s bullshit.  There is no way a whole people would stand for such stupidity.  B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T!!!!

    13 But the people are many, and it is a time of much rain, and we are not able to stand outside; neither is this a work of one day or two; for we have greatly transgressed in this matter.

    14 Let now our princes be appointed for all the assembly, and let all those who are in our cities who have married foreign women come at appointed times, and with them the elders of every city, and its judges, until the fierce wrath of our God be turned from us, until this matter is resolved.”

    Come at appointed times?  For what?

    15 Only Jonathan the son of Asahel and Jahzeiah the son of Tikvah stood up against this; and Meshullam and Shabbethai the Levite helped them.

    Yay!  Someone with a brain.

    16 The children of the captivity did so. Ezra the priest, with certain heads of fathers’ households, after their fathers’ houses, and all of them by their names, were set apart; and they sat down in the first day of the tenth month to examine the matter.

    17 They made an end with all the men who had married foreign women by the first day of the first month.

    18 Among the sons of the priests there were found who had married foreign women: of the sons of Jeshua, the son of Jozadak, and his brothers, Maaseiah, and Eliezer, and Jarib, and Gedaliah.

    19 They gave their hand that they would put away their wives; and being guilty, they offered a ram of the flock for their guilt.

    We still haven’t heard what ‘put away’ means.

    20 Of the sons of Immer: Hanani and Zebadiah.

    21 Of the sons of Harim: Maaseiah, and Elijah, and Shemaiah, and Jehiel, and Uzziah.

    22 Of the sons of Pashhur: Elioenai, Maaseiah, Ishmael, Nethanel, Jozabad, and Elasah.

    23 Of the Levites: Jozabad, and Shimei, and Kelaiah (the same is Kelita), Pethahiah, Judah, and Eliezer.

    24 Of the singers: Eliashib. Of the porters: Shallum, and Telem, and Uri.

    25 Of Israel: Of the sons of Parosh: Ramiah, and Izziah, and Malchijah, and Mijamin, and Eleazar, and Malchijah, and Benaiah.

    26 Of the sons of Elam: Mattaniah, Zechariah, and Jehiel, and Abdi, and Jeremoth, and Elijah.

    27 Of the sons of Zattu: Elioenai, Eliashib, Mattaniah, and Jeremoth, and Zabad, and Aziza.

    28 Of the sons of Bebai: Jehohanan, Hananiah, Zabbai, Athlai.

    29 Of the sons of Bani: Meshullam, Malluch, and Adaiah, Jashub, and Sheal, Jeremoth.

    30 Of the sons of Pahathmoab: Adna, and Chelal, Benaiah, Maaseiah, Mattaniah, Bezalel, and Binnui, and Manasseh.

    31 Of the sons of Harim: Eliezer, Isshijah, Malchijah, Shemaiah, Shimeon,

    32 Benjamin, Malluch, Shemariah.

    33 Of the sons of Hashum: Mattenai, Mattattah, Zabad, Eliphelet, Jeremai, Manasseh, Shimei.

    34 Of the sons of Bani: Maadai, Amram, and Uel,

    35 Benaiah, Bedeiah, Cheluhi,

    36 Vaniah, Meremoth, Eliashib,

    37 Mattaniah, Mattenai, and Jaasu,

    38 and Bani, and Binnui, Shimei,

    39 and Shelemiah, and Nathan, and Adaiah,

    40 Machnadebai, Shashai, Sharai,

    41 Azarel, and Shelemiah, Shemariah,

    42 Shallum, Amariah, Joseph.

    43 Of the sons of Nebo: Jeiel, Mattithiah, Zabad, Zebina, Iddo, and Joel, Benaiah.

    44 All these had taken foreign wives; and some of them had wives by whom they had children.

    Ok, well, this is the final in the Book of Ezra, so I don’t know when we will hear what this is all about.  Maybe we won’t.

    << Ezra 9      Index      The Post Mortem >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on August 11, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , Family, , , , , , , , , ,   

    2-Chronicles 36: Thou shalt not pick boogers!!! 

    2-Chronicles Part 36 of 36

    1 Then the people of the land took Jehoahaz the son of Josiah, and made him king in his father’s place in Jerusalem.

    I bet he wouldn’t have been all that happy about it.  Kings have a habit of dying before their time with God on their side.

    2 Joahaz was twenty-three years old when he began to reign; and he reigned three months in Jerusalem.

    Wow, that was a short one.

    3 The king of Egypt deposed him at Jerusalem, and fined the land one hundred talents of silver and a talent of gold.

    And the ‘land’ dipped into it’s Piggy Bank and paid up.  Damned extortionists!

    4 The king of Egypt made Eliakim his brother king over Judah and Jerusalem, and changed his name to Jehoiakim. Neco took Joahaz his brother, and carried him to Egypt.

    I bet he was tired after that.

    5 Jehoiakim was twenty-five years old when he began to reign; and he reigned eleven years in Jerusalem: and he did that which was evil in the sight of Yahweh his God.

    Masturbation?  IVF?  Stem Cell research?  Attend a gay pride rally?

    6 Against him came up Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon, and bound him in fetters, to carry him to Babylon.

    They like carrying people around.  It’s good exercise.

    7 Nebuchadnezzar also carried off the vessels of the house of Yahweh to Babylon, and put them in his temple at Babylon.

    He must have had big hands.

    8 Now the rest of the acts of Jehoiakim, and his abominations which he did, and that which was found in him, behold, they are written in the book of the kings of Israel and Judah: and Jehoiachin his son reigned in his place.

    Is this book of the kings some kind of dossier or rap sheet containing all their criminal acts?  It sounds like it.

    9 Jehoiachin was eight years old when he began to reign; and he reigned three months and ten days in Jerusalem: and he did that which was evil in the sight of Yahweh.

    He did evil at eight years old?  Picked boogers out of his nose?  Missed the toilet?

    10 At the return of the year king Nebuchadnezzar sent, and brought him to Babylon, with the goodly vessels of the house of Yahweh, and made Zedekiah his brother king over Judah and Jerusalem.

    Is Zedekiah, Nebuchadnezzar’s brother or Jehoiachin’s brother?  It doesn’t specify.

    11 Zedekiah was twenty-one years old when he began to reign; and he reigned eleven years in Jerusalem:

    12 and he did that which was evil in the sight of Yahweh his God; he didn’t humble himself before Jeremiah the prophet speaking from the mouth of Yahweh.

    God can’t look after an eight year old for more than three months, but allows a twenty one year old to carry on being ‘evil’ for eleven years?  That doesn’t sound like he has much power over anything.

    13 He also rebelled against king Nebuchadnezzar, who had made him swear by God: but he stiffened his neck, and hardened his heart against turning to Yahweh, the God of Israel.

    God couldn’t overcome human stubbornness?

    14 Moreover all the chiefs of the priests, and the people, trespassed very greatly after all the abominations of the nations; and they polluted the house of Yahweh which he had made holy in Jerusalem.

    How did they do that?  Spit?  Fart?  Pray to the Flying Spaghetti Monster?

    15 Yahweh, the God of their fathers, sent to them by his messengers, rising up early and sending, because he had compassion on his people, and on his dwelling place:

    God rose up early?  He has a bedtime?  Does he wear a nightcap?

     

    Poor tired old bugger!

    He Rose Early!

    16 but they mocked the messengers of God, and despised his words, and scoffed at his prophets, until the wrath of Yahweh arose against his people, until there was no remedy.

    This is a tired old refrain.

    17 Therefore he brought on them the king of the Chaldeans, who killed their young men with the sword in the house of their sanctuary, and had no compassion on young man or virgin, old man or gray-headed: he gave them all into his hand.

    So no man, young or old was spared.  That would mean there were no men left in Israel.

    18 All the vessels of God’s house, great and small, and the treasures of the house of Yahweh, and the treasures of the king, and of his princes, all these he brought to Babylon.

    Why did God want all this paraphernalia in the first place if he couldn’t or wouldn’t take care of it?  He’s allowed it to be looted so many times.

    19 They burnt God’s house, and broke down the wall of Jerusalem, and burnt all its palaces with fire, and destroyed all the goodly vessels of it.

    And the women?

    20 He carried those who had escaped from the sword away to Babylon; and they were servants to him and his sons until the reign of the kingdom of Persia:

    Then who was left to look after the women?

    21 to fulfill the word of Yahweh by the mouth of Jeremiah, until the land had enjoyed its Sabbaths. As long as it lay desolate it kept Sabbath, to fulfill seventy years.

    No men for seventy years.  Even the youngest female would be past childbearing age by that time.  So no more Israel?

    22 Now in the first year of Cyrus king of Persia, that the word of Yahweh by the mouth of Jeremiah might be accomplished, Yahweh stirred up the spirit of Cyrus king of Persia, so that he made a proclamation throughout all his kingdom, and put it also in writing, saying,

    23 ”Thus says Cyrus king of Persia, ‘Yahweh, the God of heaven, has given all the kingdoms of the earth to me; and he has commanded me to build him a house in Jerusalem, which is in Judah. Whoever there is among you of all his people, Yahweh his God be with him, and let him go up.’”

    Putting your heads on the chopping block is what it would be.  Wake up guys!  He’s a dick!

    << 2-Chronicles 35      Index      The Post Mortem>>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on April 19, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , , Family, , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,   

    2-Samuel: The Post Mortem 

    2-Samuel: What was it all about?

    After having read all the way through Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, Deuteronomy, Joshua, Judges, Ruth, 1-Samuel and now 2-Samuel, I have a really hard time looking believers in the eye and seeing people I can truly say I’d want to call friends.  I know some that I really like, but it has me dumfounded how they can read this crap and still call themselves Christians.

    One guy wants to be king and is willing to kill his father to achieve that.  THAT is not moral.  They fight and tens of thousand of soldiers die because they can’t sort out a family squabble.

    The King has an attack of the guilts and asks God to cleanse him of the guilt.  What does God do?  Kills seventy thousand people with a plague.  I’m really at a loss for words here.  How can any minister, pastor, priest or plain old sock puppet even begin to try and explain that?

    One of David’s most trusted men, Joab, goes around defying David at every turn and yet so far, he hasn’t been made to pay for it.

    David makes the decision to leave ten of his concubines at the palace while he runs away to save his own skin, then on returning, he imprisons them for the rest of their lives.  No explanation, no nothing.

    I would love nothing more than to add a couple of hundred more words here, but 2-Samuel is just to typical of everything else we’ve read so far that it’s all just blurring in to one big facepalm. If the plot doesn’t soon change, the comments are going to get very thin on the ground.

    Just to finish off though, if you wish to teach your children lessons in morality you show them moral things happening.  If you wish to teach them how to hold a mug, you show them how THAT is done.  You show them what you want them to learn.  There is NOTHING in this book so far that I would want to teach my children by example.  It is NOT a moral book in any way, shape or form.  At least so far.  I’m willing to keep an open mind, but it’s becoming harder by the page.  Let’s hope that 1-Kings starts to change things.  I’m not hopeful.  :(

    << 2-Samuel 24      Index      1-Kings 1 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on April 12, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , Family, , , , , , ,   

    2-Samuel 18: The stupid burns strong in this one. 

    2-Samuel: Part 18 of 24

    1 David mustered the men who were with him and appointed over them commanders of thousands and commanders of hundreds.

    2 David sent out his troops, a third under the command of Joab, a third under Joab’s brother Abishai son of Zeruiah, and a third under Ittai the Gittite. The king told the troops, “I myself will surely march out with you.”

    3 But the men said, “You must not go out; if we are forced to flee, they won’t care about us. Even if half of us die, they won’t care; but you are worth ten thousand of us. It would be better now for you to give us support from the city.”

    4 The king answered, “I will do whatever seems best to you.”

    Hey, who’s in charge here?

    So the king stood beside the gate while all his men marched out in units of hundreds and of thousands.

    5 The king commanded Joab, Abishai and Ittai, “Be gentle with the young man Absalom for my sake.” And all the troops heard the king giving orders concerning Absalom to each of the commanders.

    This man, Absalom, is giving orders that will have see a lot of these men die and yet they are told to hold back?  Freaking ridiculous.

    6 David’s army marched out of the city to fight Israel, and the battle took place in the forest of Ephraim.

    7 There Israel’s troops were routed by David’s men, and the casualties that day were great—twenty thousand men.

    Twenty Thousand men dead because David and his son won’t make up?  It’s a family squabble and others die because neither of them have a mind of their own or the ability to think for themselves.  That’s the stupidity of becoming a sock puppet.

    8 The battle spread out over the whole countryside, and the forest swallowed up more men that day than the sword.

    Even if I go with the lower amount and interpret this as saying that more than ten thousand men were lost in a forest, I have to call you on it.  That is one ridiculously stupid lie.

    9 Now Absalom happened to meet David’s men. He was riding his mule, and as the mule went under the thick branches of a large oak, Absalom’s hair got caught in the tree. He was left hanging in midair, while the mule he was riding kept on going.

    A thick branch of a large oak could not catch enough hair to support a grown man.  Not to mention the size of a mule with a man sitting on it would not be high enough to hold a grown man aloft once he’d come off the mule.  Yet another piece of mule shit.

    10 When one of the men saw what had happened, he told Joab, “I just saw Absalom hanging in an oak tree.”

    11 Joab said to the man who had told him this, “What! You saw him? Why didn’t you strike him to the ground right there? Then I would have had to give you ten shekels of silver and a warrior’s belt.”

    12 But the man replied, “Even if a thousand shekels were weighed out into my hands, I would not lay a hand on the king’s son. In our hearing the king commanded you and Abishai and Ittai, ‘Protect the young man Absalom for my sake.’

    13 And if I had put my life in jeopardy—and nothing is hidden from the king—you would have kept your distance from me.”

    Smart man.

    14 Joab said, “I’m not going to wait like this for you.” So he took three javelins in his hand and plunged them into Absalom’s heart while Absalom was still alive in the oak tree.

    Oooooh, not good Joab!  David is gonna be pissed.

    15 And ten of Joab’s armor-bearers surrounded Absalom, struck him and killed him.

    Three javelins into Absalom’s heart would have killed him.  One would have killed him.  He could not have been alive for Joab’s armour-bearers to kill.  Morons.

    16 Then Joab sounded the trumpet, and the troops stopped pursuing Israel, for Joab halted them.

    17 They took Absalom, threw him into a big pit in the forest and piled up a large heap of rocks over him. Meanwhile, all the Israelites fled to their homes.

    I wonder how Joab will explain this to David.  Or will he lie?

    18 During his lifetime Absalom had taken a pillar and erected it in the King’s Valley as a monument to himself, for he thought, “I have no son to carry on the memory of my name.” He named the pillar after himself, and it is called Absalom’s Monument to this day.

    David Mourns

    19 Now Ahimaaz son of Zadok said, “Let me run and take the news to the king that the LORD has vindicated him by delivering him from the hand of his enemies.”

    20 “You are not the one to take the news today,” Joab told him. “You may take the news another time, but you must not do so today, because the king’s son is dead.”

    Why not?

    21 Then Joab said to a Cushite, “Go, tell the king what you have seen.” The Cushite bowed down before Joab and ran off.

    What is the difference between them that it would make a difference in telling David the news?

    22 Ahimaaz son of Zadok again said to Joab, “Come what may, please let me run behind the Cushite.”

    But Joab replied, “My son, why do you want to go? You don’t have any news that will bring you a reward.”

    23 He said, “Come what may, I want to run.”

    So Joab said, “Run!” Then Ahimaaz ran by way of the plain and outran the Cushite.

    This could be trouble.

    24 While David was sitting between the inner and outer gates, the watchman went up to the roof of the gateway by the wall. As he looked out, he saw a man running alone.

    25 The watchman called out to the king and reported it.

    The king said, “If he is alone, he must have good news.” And the runner came closer and closer.

    Why would alone mean it is good news?

    26 Then the watchman saw another runner, and he called down to the gatekeeper, “Look, another man running alone!”

    The king said, “He must be bringing good news, too.”

    Same question.

    27 The watchman said, “It seems to me that the first one runs like Ahimaaz son of Zadok.”

    “He’s a good man,” the king said. “He comes with good news.”

    28 Then Ahimaaz called out to the king, “All is well!” He bowed down before the king with his face to the ground and said, “Praise be to the LORD your God! He has delivered up those who lifted their hands against my lord the king.”

    29 The king asked, “Is the young man Absalom safe?”

    Ahimaaz answered, “I saw great confusion just as Joab was about to send the king’s servant and me, your servant, but I don’t know what it was.”

    Lying to the King.

    30 The king said, “Stand aside and wait here.” So he stepped aside and stood there.

    31 Then the Cushite arrived and said, “My lord the king, hear the good news! The LORD has vindicated you today by delivering you from the hand of all who rose up against you.”

    32 The king asked the Cushite, “Is the young man Absalom safe?”

    The Cushite replied, “May the enemies of my lord the king and all who rise up to harm you be like that young man.”

    33 The king was shaken. He went up to the room over the gateway and wept. As he went, he said: “O my son Absalom! My son, my son Absalom! If only I had died instead of you—O Absalom, my son, my son!”

    He doesn’t even ask how it happened?  No need to find out and punish the person who disobeyed his direct orders?  Very, very unlike David.  Stupid book.

    << 2-Samuel 17      Index      2-Samuel 19 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on April 10, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , , Family, , , , , , , , ,   

    2-Samuel 16: Dear Daddy, I Know Where You Live. Bwahahaha! 

    2-Samuel: Part 16 of 24
    David and Ziba

    1 When David had gone a short distance beyond the summit, there was Ziba, the steward of Mephibosheth, waiting to meet him. He had a string of donkeys saddled and loaded with two hundred loaves of bread, a hundred cakes of raisins, a hundred cakes of figs and a skin of wine.

    2 The king asked Ziba, “Why have you brought these?”

    Ziba answered, “The donkeys are for the king’s household to ride on, the bread and fruit are for the men to eat, and the wine is to refresh those who become exhausted in the wilderness.”

    3 The king then asked, “Where is your master’s grandson?”

    Ziba said to him, “He is staying in Jerusalem, because he thinks, ‘Today the Israelites will restore to me my grandfather’s kingdom.’”

    4 Then the king said to Ziba, “All that belonged to Mephibosheth is now yours.”

    “I humbly bow,” Ziba said. “May I find favor in your eyes, my lord the king.”

    David is a dispossessed king and he thinks he can still give things away like this?

    Shimei Curses David

    5 As King David approached Bahurim, a man from the same clan as Saul’s family came out from there. His name was Shimei son of Gera, and he cursed as he came out.

    6 He pelted David and all the king’s officials with stones, though all the troops and the special guard were on David’s right and left.

    7 As he cursed, Shimei said, “Get out, get out, you murderer, you scoundrel!

    8 The LORD has repaid you for all the blood you shed in the household of Saul, in whose place you have reigned. The LORD has given the kingdom into the hands of your son Absalom. You have come to ruin because you are a murderer!”

    Absalom is a murderer too.

    9 Then Abishai son of Zeruiah said to the king, “Why should this dead dog curse my lord the king? Let me go over and cut off his head.”

    10 But the king said, “What does this have to do with you, you sons of Zeruiah? If he is cursing because the LORD said to him, ‘Curse David,’ who can ask, ‘Why do you do this?’”

    How does he know the Lord told him to say that?  He didn’t inquire whether the man who killed Saul was told to be the Lord before he killed him.

    11 David then said to Abishai and all his officials, “My son, my own flesh and blood, is trying to kill me. How much more, then, this Benjamite! Leave him alone; let him curse, for the LORD has told him to.

    12 It may be that the LORD will look upon my misery and restore to me his covenant blessing instead of his curse today.”

    13 So David and his men continued along the road while Shimei was going along the hillside opposite him, cursing as he went and throwing stones at him and showering him with dirt.

    14 The king and all the people with him arrived at their destination exhausted. And there he refreshed himself.

    The Advice of Ahithophel and Hushai

    15 Meanwhile, Absalom and all the men of Israel came to Jerusalem, and Ahithophel was with him.

    16 Then Hushai the Arkite, David’s confidant, went to Absalom and said to him, “Long live the king! Long live the king!”

    17 Absalom said to Hushai, “So this is the love you show your friend? If he’s your friend, why didn’t you go with him?”

    18 Hushai said to Absalom, “No, the one chosen by the LORD, by these people, and by all the men of Israel—his I will be, and I will remain with him.

    Oh yeah, keep the lies coming.

    19 Furthermore, whom should I serve? Should I not serve the son? Just as I served your father, so I will serve you.”

    20 Absalom said to Ahithophel, “Give us your advice. What should we do?”

    21 Ahithophel answered, “Sleep with your father’s concubines whom he left to take care of the palace. Then all Israel will hear that you have made yourself obnoxious to your father, and the hands of everyone with you will be more resolute.”

    That’s one way to piss your father off.

    22 So they pitched a tent for Absalom on the roof, and he slept with his father’s concubines in the sight of all Israel.

    23 Now in those days the advice Ahithophel gave was like that of one who inquires of God. That was how both David and Absalom regarded all of Ahithophel’s advice.

    << 2-Samuel 15       Index      2-Samuel 17 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on April 8, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , Family, , , , , , , , ,   

    2-Samuel 14: How do you beat a murder rap? Kiss God’s Arse! – The Bible 

    2-Samuel: Part 14 of 24
    Absalom Returns to Jerusalem

    1 Joab son of Zeruiah knew that the king’s heart longed for Absalom.

    So he loved his son’s murderer.  Can’t blame him in one way as his son’s murderer is also his son.  But as the murdered son is also the same son that raped his own sister, it’s a bit of a mess.

    2 So Joab sent someone to Tekoa and had a wise woman brought from there. He said to her, “Pretend you are in mourning. Dress in mourning clothes, and don’t use any cosmetic lotions. Act like a woman who has spent many days grieving for the dead.

    3 Then go to the king and speak these words to him.” And Joab put the words in her mouth.

    Hiring someone to lie to the King?  Couldn’t that be treason?

    4 When the woman from Tekoa went to the king, she fell with her face to the ground to pay him honor, and she said, “Help me, Your Majesty!”

    5 The king asked her, “What is troubling you?”

    She said, “I am a widow; my husband is dead.

    6 I your servant had two sons. They got into a fight with each other in the field, and no one was there to separate them. One struck the other and killed him.

    7 Now the whole clan has risen up against your servant; they say, ‘Hand over the one who struck his brother down, so that we may put him to death for the life of his brother whom he killed; then we will get rid of the heir as well.’ They would put out the only burning coal I have left, leaving my husband neither name nor descendant on the face of the earth.”

    8 The king said to the woman, “Go home, and I will issue an order in your behalf.”

    9 But the woman from Tekoa said to him, “Let my lord the king pardon me and my family, and let the king and his throne be without guilt.”

    10 The king replied, “If anyone says anything to you, bring them to me, and they will not bother you again.”

    11 She said, “Then let the king invoke the LORD his God to prevent the avenger of blood from adding to the destruction, so that my son will not be destroyed.”

    “As surely as the LORD lives,” he said, “not one hair of your son’s head will fall to the ground.”

    12 Then the woman said, “Let your servant speak a word to my lord the king.”

    “Speak,” he replied.

    13 The woman said, “Why then have you devised a thing like this against the people of God? When the king says this, does he not convict himself, for the king has not brought back his banished son?

    14 Like water spilled on the ground, which cannot be recovered, so we must die. But that is not what God desires; rather, he devises ways so that a banished person does not remain banished from him.

    That only applies to some.  Do him wrong and you’re likely to be dead before you know it’s happening.  God didn’t care about the incestuous rape or the murder.  So why should he care about Absalom?  Or is it that it’s alright if you are a believer?  Does being a believer or a King’s son give you a get out of jail free card?

    15 “And now I have come to say this to my lord the king because the people have made me afraid. Your servant thought, ‘I will speak to the king; perhaps he will grant his servant’s request.

    16 Perhaps the king will agree to deliver his servant from the hand of the man who is trying to cut off both me and my son from God’s inheritance.’

    There is no inheritance.  Only stolen land and goods.  That’s called your cut of the loot.

    17 “And now your servant says, ‘May the word of my lord the king secure my inheritance, for my lord the king is like an angel of God in discerning good and evil. May the LORD your God be with you.’”

    Killing people for no reason or when they were only trying to do good deeds does not make one an angel of God.  David is a murdering sack of shit.

    18 Then the king said to the woman, “Don’t keep from me the answer to what I am going to ask you.”

    “Let my lord the king speak,” the woman said.

    19 The king asked, “Isn’t the hand of Joab with you in all this?”

    The woman answered, “As surely as you live, my lord the king, no one can turn to the right or to the left from anything my lord the king says. Yes, it was your servant Joab who instructed me to do this and who put all these words into the mouth of your servant.

    The last time someone told the truth about trying to do the right thing they were summarily executed.

    20 Your servant Joab did this to change the present situation. My lord has wisdom like that of an angel of God—he knows everything that happens in the land.”

    But, as you are very good at sucking up to the King, you’ll probably get away with it.

    21 The king said to Joab, “Very well, I will do it. Go, bring back the young man Absalom.”

    22 Joab fell with his face to the ground to pay him honor, and he blessed the king. Joab said, “Today your servant knows that he has found favor in your eyes, my lord the king, because the king has granted his servant’s request.”

    23 Then Joab went to Geshur and brought Absalom back to Jerusalem.

    24 But the king said, “He must go to his own house; he must not see my face.” So Absalom went to his own house and did not see the face of the king.

    25 In all Israel there was not a man so highly praised for his handsome appearance as Absalom. From the top of his head to the sole of his foot there was no blemish in him.

    Except that he was a murderer.

    26 Whenever he cut the hair of his head—he used to cut his hair once a year because it became too heavy for him—he would weigh it, and its weight was two hundred shekels by the royal standard.

    What has that to do with anything?

    27 Three sons and a daughter were born to Absalom. His daughter’s name was Tamar, and she became a beautiful woman.

    28 Absalom lived two years in Jerusalem without seeing the king’s face.

    29 Then Absalom sent for Joab in order to send him to the king, but Joab refused to come to him. So he sent a second time, but he refused to come.

    30 Then he said to his servants, “Look, Joab’s field is next to mine, and he has barley there. Go and set it on fire.” So Absalom’s servants set the field on fire.

    31 Then Joab did go to Absalom’s house, and he said to him, “Why have your servants set my field on fire?”

    32 Absalom said to Joab, “Look, I sent word to you and said, ‘Come here so I can send you to the king to ask, “Why have I come from Geshur? It would be better for me if I were still there!”’ Now then, I want to see the king’s face, and if I am guilty of anything, let him put me to death.”

    You are guilty.  Of murder.

    33 So Joab went to the king and told him this. Then the king summoned Absalom, and he came in and bowed down with his face to the ground before the king. And the king kissed Absalom.

    Is there to be any punishment for murder?

    << 2-Samuel 13       Index      2-Samuel 15 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on April 6, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , , , Family, , , , , , , , ,   

    2-Samuel 12: Don’t dissapoint God or he’ll kill your innocent child. 

    2-Samuel: Part 12 of 24
    Nathan Rebukes David

    1 The LORD sent Nathan to David. When he came to him, he said, “There were two men in a certain town, one rich and the other poor.

    Unless you had something to hide you would not say ‘a certain town’. You would name it.  If this is just metaphor, then you wouldn’t need to mention the town at all.  But then, this is the bible, the book of stuff and nonsense.

    2 The rich man had a very large number of sheep and cattle,

    3 but the poor man had nothing except one little ewe lamb he had bought. He raised it, and it grew up with him and his children. It shared his food, drank from his cup and even slept in his arms. It was like a daughter to him.

    4 “Now a traveler came to the rich man, but the rich man refrained from taking one of his own sheep or cattle to prepare a meal for the traveler who had come to him. Instead, he took the ewe lamb that belonged to the poor man and prepared it for the one who had come to him.”

    5 David burned with anger against the man and said to Nathan, “As surely as the LORD lives, the man who did this must die!

    Death, death, death. That’s all they can think of lately.  Or ever!

    6 He must pay for that lamb four times over, because he did such a thing and had no pity.”

    Hamstringing 900 horses is ok though?

    7 Then Nathan said to David, “You are the man! This is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: ‘I anointed you king over Israel, and I delivered you from the hand of Saul.

    8 I gave your master’s house to you, and your master’s wives into your arms. I gave you all Israel and Judah. And if all this had been too little, I would have given you even more.

    Why didn’t God say this himself?  Why didn’t God just give David Uriah’s wife then instead of letting it get this far?

    9 Why did you despise the word of the LORD by doing what is evil in his eyes? You struck down Uriah the Hittite with the sword and took his wife to be your own. You killed him with the sword of the Ammonites.

    That’s not exactly much of a sin considering the hundreds of thousands they’ve been killing is it!

    10 Now, therefore, the sword will never depart from your house, because you despised me and took the wife of Uriah the Hittite to be your own.’

    11 “This is what the LORD says: ‘Out of your own household I am going to bring calamity on you. Before your very eyes I will take your wives and give them to one who is close to you, and he will sleep with your wives in broad daylight.

    So God gets to make this happen to these women without their consent? I wonder what that would be called in a court of law?

    12 You did it in secret, but I will do this thing in broad daylight before all Israel.’”

    I wonder if these women would be ok with that?

    13 Then David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against the LORD.”

    Nathan replied, “The LORD has taken away your sin. You are not going to die.

    14 But because by doing this you have shown utter contempt for the LORD, the son born to you will die.”

    Free the guilty and kill the innocent!  Typical of God.

    15 After Nathan had gone home, the LORD struck the child that Uriah’s wife had borne to David, and he became ill.

    16 David pleaded with God for the child. He fasted and spent the nights lying in sackcloth on the ground.

    17 The elders of his household stood beside him to get him up from the ground, but he refused, and he would not eat any food with them.

    Why not just take his own life and get it over with?

    18 On the seventh day the child died. David’s attendants were afraid to tell him that the child was dead, for they thought, “While the child was still living, he wouldn’t listen to us when we spoke to him. How can we now tell him the child is dead? He may do something desperate.”

    19 David noticed that his attendants were whispering among themselves, and he realized the child was dead. “Is the child dead?” he asked.

    “Yes,” they replied, “he is dead.”

    20 Then David got up from the ground. After he had washed, put on lotions and changed his clothes, he went into the house of the LORD and worshiped. Then he went to his own house, and at his request they served him food, and he ate.

    How can anyone worship the despicable bastard that killed their child?  This is utter garbage.  Vile, evil garbage.

    21 His attendants asked him, “Why are you acting this way? While the child was alive, you fasted and wept, but now that the child is dead, you get up and eat!”

    22 He answered, “While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept. I thought, ‘Who knows? The LORD may be gracious to me and let the child live.’

    23 But now that he is dead, why should I go on fasting? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me.”

    24 Then David comforted his wife Bathsheba, and he went to her and made love to her. She gave birth to a son, and they named him Solomon. The LORD loved him;

    Why couldn’t the Lord love the other child?

    25 and because the LORD loved him, he sent word through Nathan the prophet to name him Jedidiah.

    26 Meanwhile Joab fought against Rabbah of the Ammonites and captured the royal citadel.

    27 Joab then sent messengers to David, saying, “I have fought against Rabbah and taken its water supply.

    28 Now muster the rest of the troops and besiege the city and capture it. Otherwise I will take the city, and it will be named after me.”

    Very nice.   Threatening the King?

    29 So David mustered the entire army and went to Rabbah, and attacked and captured it.

    30 David took the crown from their king’s head, and it was placed on his own head. It weighed a talent of gold, and it was set with precious stones. David took a great quantity of plunder from the city

    Stole is the word you should have used.   David is a murderer and a thief.  Most probably a rapist as well.

    31 and brought out the people who were there, consigning them to labor with saws and with iron picks and axes, and he made them work at brickmaking. David did this to all the Ammonite towns. Then he and his entire army returned to Jerusalem.

    Oh yeah, a slaver and slave owner as well.  Mustn’t forget that.

    << 2-Samuel 11       Index      2-Samuel 13 >>

     

  • DistroMan 20:00 on February 23, 2011 Permalink
    Tags: , , , , Family, , , , , , , ,   

    1-Samuel 3: Here Samuel, come here boy! Sit! 

    1-Samuel: Part 3 of 31
    The LORD Calls Samuel

    1 The boy Samuel ministered before the LORD under Eli. In those days the word of the LORD was rare; there were not many visions.

    2 One night Eli, whose eyes were becoming so weak that he could barely see, was lying down in his usual place.

    3 The lamp of God had not yet gone out, and Samuel was lying down in the house of the LORD, where the ark of God was.

    4 Then the LORD called Samuel. Samuel answered, “Here I am.”

    5 And he ran to Eli and said, “Here I am; you called me.” But Eli said, “I did not call; go back and lie down.” So he went and lay down.

    6 Again the LORD called, “Samuel!” And Samuel got up and went to Eli and said, “Here I am; you called me.”  “My son,” Eli said, “I did not call; go back and lie down.”

    7 Now Samuel did not yet know the LORD: The word of the LORD had not yet been revealed to him.

    8 A third time the LORD called, “Samuel!” And Samuel got up and went to Eli and said, “Here I am; you called me.” Then Eli realized that the LORD was calling the boy.

    9 So Eli told Samuel, “Go and lie down, and if he calls you, say, ‘Speak, LORD, for your servant is listening.’” So Samuel went and lay down in his place.

    10 The LORD came and stood there, calling as at the other times, “Samuel! Samuel!”  Then Samuel said, “Speak, for your servant is listening.”

    Aha, this is like Vampires.  God can’t come in unless you invite him.  Very cool information I must say.

    11 And the LORD said to Samuel: “See, I am about to do something in Israel that will make the ears of everyone who hears about it tingle.

    12 At that time I will carry out against Eli everything I spoke against his family—from beginning to end.

    13 For I told him that I would judge his family forever because of the sin he knew about; his sons blasphemed God, and he failed to restrain them.

    Ah, but God is the one with all the superpowers and the buck stops with him.  It is his fault.  He failed to restrain them.

    14 Therefore I swore to the house of Eli, ‘The guilt of Eli’s house will never be atoned for by sacrifice or offering.’”

    15 Samuel lay down until morning and then opened the doors of the house of the LORD. He was afraid to tell Eli the vision,

    16 but Eli called him and said, “Samuel, my son.”  Samuel answered, “Here I am.”

    17 “What was it he said to you?” Eli asked. “Do not hide it from me. May God deal with you, be it ever so severely, if you hide from me anything he told you.”

    18 So Samuel told him everything, hiding nothing from him. Then Eli said, “He is the LORD; let him do what is good in his eyes.”

    19 The LORD was with Samuel as he grew up, and he let none of Samuel’s words fall to the ground.

    20 And all Israel from Dan to Beersheba recognized that Samuel was attested as a prophet of the LORD.

    21 The LORD continued to appear at Shiloh, and there he revealed himself to Samuel through his word.

    The trouble is that everytime God shows up, untold misery and loss of life seems to follow.

    << 1-Samuel 2       Index      1-Samuel 4 >>

     

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